


Introvert

by Hazzaandloubearforever



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Bottom Louis, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Mentions of Rape, Mpreg, Natural birth scene, Sex in later chapters, Top Harry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-18
Updated: 2019-02-07
Packaged: 2019-05-08 14:37:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 13
Words: 29,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14696235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hazzaandloubearforever/pseuds/Hazzaandloubearforever
Summary: Louis was the suffer-in-silence kid everyone ignored growing up. Often times, Louis wondered what he did to provoke such a response and eventually, as he got older and grew more mature, he tended to ignore the people all the same. Perhaps the reason for the students’ ignorant behavior had something to do with the fact that he just didn’t fit in. Despite the fact that he came from a wealthy family who expected nothing but the best for their firstborn among the rest of the students whose parents expected the same, Louis never rubbed his wealth into other’s faces.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi peoples!! I'm back with another work! This one is slightly my favorite since Harry is such a sweetie in this one despite Louis' stubbornness!
> 
> I've got the majority of this story completed but I figured I'd upload what I have completed so far! :D I have a general idea on where I want this to go and I hope you all enjoy! :D
> 
>  
> 
> As always, kudos and comments are welcomed! Xx

“Damnit!” Louis huffed when his books toppled to the floor and scattered across the linoleum floor. It was just Louis’ luck that he’d be the laughing stock amongst the thousands of students who just witnessed Louis’ embarrassment. He hoped people would ignore the pregnant college kid and go about their business but the four heavy books he dropped echoed the hallway, catching the attention of every student in the vicinity. 

Louis was the suffer-in-silence kid everyone ignored growing up. Often times, Louis wondered what he did to provoke such a response and eventually, as he got older and grew more mature, he tended to ignore the people all the same. Perhaps the reason for the students’ ignorant behavior had something to do with the fact that he just didn’t fit in. Despite the fact that he came from a wealthy family who expected nothing but the best for their firstborn among the rest of the students whose parents expected the same, Louis never rubbed his wealth into other’s faces. 

Time and time again, he watched his peers drive up in the latest BMWs, Mercedes, and Audis, flaunting the newest technologies, the trendiest clothes and shoes, and for what? It was daddy’s money anyway, not theirs. People could assume that’s where everything stemmed—why Louis was different from his peers. He had one friend, Niall, who was just as wealthy as him but was humble about it and that’s what Louis admired about him. Niall was the only kid that didn’t judge Louis when he opted to stay in with a good book or movie instead of a night partying on the town with the rest of classmates, getting drunk and wreaking havoc. Niall was polite enough to cancel plans with his friends to stay in with Louis and watch reruns of reality shows or horror films. If only Louis had opted to stay in that _one_ night, then perhaps he wouldn’t be in this predicament; pregnant and alone.

Louis scoffed to himself when he had to squat down, one hand under his bump as the other collected the contents that spilled from his messenger bag. If Louis put anything more into his bag, his shoulder would surely dislocate. With another huff, Louis stood erect, knees and joints popping in in protest as he zipped his messenger bag closed. He doesn’t remember ever feeling this achy. Then again, he _was_ pregnant and achy muscles were part of the package, right?

Louis was still getting used to the idea that he would be responsible for another life in a few months. _How the fuck did this even happen? Oh, yeah, Declan. Fucking Declan._ Louis sighed, running his fingers through his hair before he traipsed down the hall of Columbia University.

It was a miracle he hadn’t dropped out yet. Hell, it was a miracle his GPA was still a 3.5. It’s even more a miracle that he’s juggling classes _and_ holding down a job unlike the rest of the snobbish students attending. Majoring in Criminal Psychology seemed like a brilliant idea when he first got accepted but that was before Declan. Before that night. Before he got pregnant. Fucking A. 

Louis trudged into English 202, finding a seat in the first row and dropped his bag next to his feet, sighing in relief when his shoulder finally caught a break. From unfortunate experiences, Louis learned to _never_ sit in the back. Bad shit occurs in the back.

As other students filtered into the class, Louis dropped his head to his folded arms while he waited patiently for the professor to set up her lecture. The sooner they began, the sooner Louis could attend his other three classes and the sooner he can head back home to _finally_ get some rest. It was his first day off in twelve days and he’d welcome that day off happily. 

“Louis Tomlinson?” the professor called. Louis raised his hand, murmuring a ‘present’ before letting his hand drop back to the table to grab his notebook and pen. Louis kept his gaze on the worn cover of his notebook, fearing to look up and see twenty pairs of eyes staring at him. This could all be in Louis’ head considering half the students in this class probably didn’t see Louis’ mishap out in the hall. When Louis finally chanced a glance around the room, he sighed in relief. Everyone was busying themselves with preparing for the day or chatting amongst each other. 

The only positive to being pregnant in college is the fact that there was no judgment. Or so Louis assumed. He’d seen a few other pregnant students around campus but most of them had wedding bands on their fingers and perhaps that is the reason they don’t get judged. But who is Louis to go and make these implications? He has no idea the predicament of these other pregnant students and vice versa on Louis’ part. When it boils down to it all, no one had approached Louis and questioned his pregnancy and he’s been grateful for that.

Professor Kip started her lecture immediately following rollcall and Louis jumped into his notes, jotting everything she wrote down on the dry-erase board. Louis’ eyes caught sight of the small white binder peeking out of his messenger bag and his stomach coiled uncomfortably with what the binder contained. Louis knew Pamela would be calling him again, wondering if he made a decision and he wasn’t ready to accept that part of reality yet.

Professor Kip was half an hour into her lecture about criticism on Edgar Allen Poe’s _The Raven_ when a lanky, curly brunette stumbled into the room, muttering a litany of apologies. Everyone’s attention whipped to the young man and Louis couldn’t help but drool at the beautiful man.

This man looked like he walked right out of a fashion magazine. With his dark skinnies that seemed painted on if the tightness was anything to go by and his floral button down that seemed to be purposely left open at the sternum followed by his long curly hair tucked artfully away with a bandana. This man was sex on legs and Louis would have assumed he’d be snarky and snobbish if it weren’t for the way he entered the classroom.

“Mr. Styles, you’re late,” Professor Kip admonished. “Quickly take your seat and turn to page four hundred and thirty six.”

Styles? What kind of person has a last name like ‘Styles?’ This man belonged on the cover of every fashion magazine, not sitting in a classroom next to students trying to obtain a degree.

“I’m so sorry for interrupting,” the man apologized for what seemed like the hundredth time since he stumbled in and took a seat in the first row and sat next to Louis. Mr. Styles--the only name Louis knew the guy by at the moment--smiled politely at Louis before grabbing his own notebook and a pen and started copying the notes off the board. 

Louis found himself ogling Mr. Adonis--yes, that was the name Louis would establish Mr. Styles by. Mr. Styles sounded too formal and Mr. Adonis was far more appropriate than Sex-On-Legs. Louis gaped at Mr. Adonis, practically undressing him with his eyes until said man caught him staring and Louis gasped, eyes dropping down to his own notes and praying that the tall man wouldn’t make a remark. 

When Professor Kip dismissed her class, Louis quickly gathered in his belongings, shoving them into his messenger back half-hazardly before rushing out of the room in a tizzy, knocking into someone in the process.

“Watch where you’re going, slut,” the girl snapped. Louis’ eyes widened at the insult, taken aback by her bluntness.

Was that what people really thought about him? That he was just some slut? He’s in college, among thousands and thousands of students. He did his fair share of remaining under the radar, attending classes, and going to work. But this _one_ female that he accidentally smacked into--this one person he’d never seen before called him a slut; as if she knew him personally--as if she knew how he got pregnant and the predicament Louis put himself in. 

Louis’ eyes welled with tears as he muttered a quick apology and ran to the nearest bathroom, the bile in his stomach creeping its way up. Louis dropped to his knees in the nearest stall and emptied his breakfast, shaky hands clinging to the bowl as he continued to vomit. 

**Harry’s POV**

Harry watched as the kid he had sat next to hurriedly gathered his items and sped out of the classroom as if he was late for something. He watched the scene unfold when he exited the class as the pregnant guy--Harry prayed that the bump the kid was sporting was indeed a pregnancy bump and not just extra weight--smacked right into Felicia. 

She was a nightmare in itself; self-absorbed and entitled. Harry had experienced her wrath back in first year of high school. She was basically the queen bee of his high school but Harry believed her title should have been Queen Bitch. If anyone she disliked so much as breathed in her vicinity, it was as if World War III had begun. Unfortunately that person to cross her path today happened to be the quiet kid Harry sat next to. Oh, the beauty of attending Columbia University. 

Harry shot Felicia a glare as she made a dramatic notion of dusting off her designer dress. Felicia had the audacity to look unnerved and stunned as if what happened to her was a life-changing event. Harry rolled his eyes and slung his backpack over his shoulder, flashing the spoiled woman a glare and headed toward the bathroom the kid disappeared to. 

Harry had seen the boy around campus a few times and from what he’s gathered, the pregnant guy kept to himself. He’d bury his nose in his books, order the same thing for lunch; a club sandwich on rye with little tomato and extra pickles with mustard, and go about his business. On his good days, Harry noticed, he might catch Louis smiling or bopping his head to whatever song filtered out of his ear buds. What happened to this kid that made him such an introvert?

The sound of a toilet flushing followed by retching pulled Harry out of his mind as he peered around the corner and found his classmate hunched over the porcelain bowl, one hand on the toilet and the other resting on the wall in front of him. Harry pursed his lips, debating whether or not to offer his assistance considering the kid may not respond to help kindly.

While Harry fought with is inner turmoil, his classmate stood up and went to the sink to rinse out his mouth. Harry couldn’t help the little smile at the small bump peeking out of Louis’ shirt. 

The pregnant lad finally met Harry’s eyes, his own widening when he followed them to his belly and was quick to yank down the worn fabric. “I suppose you think I’m a slut as well, yeah?” he answered softly, his somber eyes averting Harry’s gaze.

Harry quickly shook his head and murmured, “You’re not a slut.”

Harry’s classmate scoffed and ran his fingers through his hair, checking his appearance in the mirror. “For all you know, I could be.”

Louis’ guard was up, Harry knew that much. His short and curt responses, averting Harry’s gaze and trying to keep his voice leveled were indication of that. Harry finally noticed the red puffiness around his eyes and his heart dropped, knowing the kid took Felicia’s words to heart. Harry fish-mouthed for a response, not sure what he should say--what was _needed_ to be said and Louis caught the uncertainty on Harry’s face, eyes narrowing.

“Save it,” He spat. “I don’t need your pity.” The pregnant lad gathered his messenger back off the floor, adjusting it on his shoulder. 

The bag itself had to be at least sixty pounds based on the four textbooks he was carrying and the kid himself barely looked like he weighed a hundred pounds. He was overexerting himself and surely that wasn’t good for mom and baby. 

His classmate left the bathroom in a hurry, the door shutting with a slam as Harry stared after it. He wasn’t going to give up on this kid, he declared that much. Unlike most that probably did.


	2. Chapter 2

**Louis’ POV**

Louis hurried off campus after the incident in the bathroom. Not only did Mr. Adonis follow him into the bathroom, but he was sure he had come to call him a slut as well. The moment Mr. Adonis caught sight of his bump, Louis had panicked and he had the urge to vomit again. The whole plan about being discreet with his pregnancy was over now. The sexiest man alive knew Louis’ deepest darkest secret and any chances of what they could have been went out the window along with the idea that he could get through the next four months unnoticed.

Louis unlocked the door to his beat up ‘05 Honda Accord and tossed his bag into the backseat, cursing to himself when the contents spilled onto the floor _again._ Was today let’s-drop-Louis’-books day? Louis climbed into his car and gripped the steering wheel, letting his forehead drop to the wheel as he desperately tried to keep the tears at bay. Fuck these hormones and fuck Declan getting him pregnant. Louis hoped he never saw that fucker’s face again. The prosecutor guaranteed Louis that Declan would be sentenced to a minimum of fifteen years without the possibility of parole. Fifteen years would be enough for Louis to get his life together. Then again, Louis’ uncertain he could _ever_ get his life back together, especially with the memories that haunt him daily.

Louis scrubbed his hands over his face and let out a deep breath before jamming the key into the ignition and driving out of the campus parking lot. Most people found it absurd to own a car in New York City but Louis’ seen _The Bone Collector_ and there was no way in hell he was going to commute from work and school via taxi cab. 

Louis parked his car outside his apartment, making sure he had everything in his grasp before locking his car and hurried up the steps, punching in the four digit code and stepping into the warmth, the door trapping the cold outside. Where he lived wasn’t particularly the safest and he was told to never let someone in behind you, no matter how nice they appeared. 

Louis made the trek up to his apartment to the 5th floor, cursing the ‘OUT OF ORDER’ sign taped to the elevator as he fumbled for his house keys in his pocket. Why didn’t he have them out and in his hand like his landlord told him to? Anything could happen in the two minutes he struggled to find his bloody keys. Louis exclaimed a little ‘aha!’ when he found them and jammed the key into the hole, jiggling the lock before it finally gave way and let Louis into his home. 

The tenants of this building were among drug dealers, prostitutes, and junkies. Living in New York was expensive and on his salary all he could afford was this shithole. If he could go one day without seeing a roach on the floor, it’d be a miracle. His walls were stained with mildew and the counters were chipped and worn from water damage. His bedroom consisted of a mattress and a boxspring centered in what should be his living room. He had a couch with multiple holes that he stopped the garbage men from tossing out and a couple bedside tables he found at the Goodwill. Living in poverty wasn’t fun and that’s what going to school was supposed to change, right? 

His parents had tried, on numerous occasions to offer money to help Louis through college but Louis refused. He didn’t want to be eternally indebted to them. They were already paying for his college and he didn’t need them paying for his residence. If they knew just where he was living they wouldn’t hesitate to house Louis in the suburbs with a private car and driver since they wanted the best for their firstborn. Louis scoffed at the thought. He was relieved when he was accepted into Columbia. New York was eight hundred and twenty miles away and that was far enough away from his parents. Far away enough to be independent and live his life without the shadow of his parents and their expectations.

Louis sighed as he stared around his rundown apartment, his hands subconsciously dropping to his belly. This was definitely no place to raise a baby. How could he bring home a newborn to a roach-infested, disease-ridden, junkie and crackwhore-residing living space? Louis smiled to himself when he felt the flutters in his belly but it let it drop instantly when he realized that this baby wasn’t his. He was ninety-five percent sure he was giving it up for adoption. There’s no way in hell he could raise a child when its second father was Declan, let alone on his salary. Parenthood wasn’t for Louis and it probably never would be.

Louis decided he had enough contemplating his future and picturing what would never be and found himself rummaging through his fridge, looking for something decent to eat. He had slim pickings; a half eaten pizza shoved to the back with half a tuna sandwich wrapped in foil sat next to it. There was enough milk for one more glass and that could go great with the three pieces of stringed cheese, right? Louis finally decided on an apple hiding in the drawer and a bottled water before making his way to his bed. It was either pay the rent or food and rent seemed to be the most dire at the time. 

Though the meal was scarce, it did enough to quell his hunger and made a mental note to work some extra hours this week for a little extra in his next paycheck. Louis took a quick shower, the water turning cold after ten minutes and quickly dressed into a pair of sweats and a hoodie and buried himself into a cocoon of his blankets. The weather was brutal outside and since Louis couldn’t afford to get the heater fixed, he had to settle for hoodies and layers of blankets. From his view on his bed, he could stare out his window into the crisp evening night, with the stars and moon illuminating the streets below. The only pro to living in a shitty apartment on the fifth floor was the view he got every night.

The following morning started without incident. It was another begrudging day at Columbia for Louis. Now, don’t get Louis wrong, he had his fair share of enjoyment when he first attended college. The classes were easy, he was passing with flying colors and the fun he procured during his freshman year with his best friend Niall had him enjoying life. But then Niall got a scholarship in Ireland to play professional soccer and he had to leave his best friend. Now, Louis was three years in and each day seemed to drag on like the last. Not to mention he met Declan and that monster destroyed his life forever.

Louis headed toward one his classes, keeping his head down to avoid any unnecessary eye contact, a protective hand resting on his belly. The next time Louis glanced up, people were giving him odd stares and the pregnant lad tensed, dropping his hand in favor of grabbing the strap of his messenger back instead. His eyes dropped to the floor again as he picked up the pace, just desperately wanting to reach the Liberal Arts building. But, of course, God is never on Louis’ side, so he thinks, as he yet again collided into a hard mass sending him teetering to the floor. Searing pain shot up Louis’ spine as his hands flew to his belly. _Come on, baby, please be okay. Please be okay._

“Shit, are you alright?” a familiar voice asked sounding panicked.

“Just fine,” Louis mumbled, saying just about anything to just get off the floor and forget that he’s just become the laughing stock of the population hovering in the hallway. Just as Louis made a move to stand, he felt a pair of arms hoist him to his feet and Louis visibly stiffened, coiling away from the innocent gesture as chilling memories flooded his mind. “Don’t touch me!”

The pair of arms in question quickly released Louis and the figure belonging to them took a step back. “Whoa, there, I’m sorry. I was only trying to help,” the figure murmured.

Louis fiddled with the hem of his shirt as he finally gazed into the eyes of the culprit and realized it was the one and only Mr. Adonis. Of course, he still looked like a supermodel donning the same skinnies but this time clad in a sheer black shirt unbuttoned to the sternum. He forwent the bandana in favor of pulling his hair into a tight bun and this look was just as attractive. This man could wear sweatpants and a holey shirt and he’d still look like sex on legs. 

Louis narrowed his eyes at the man and adjusted his bag across his chest. “Thanks, but I don’t need your help,” Louis spat as he pushed past him.

“Hey, wait a minute,” Mr. Adonis argued, grabbing Louis by his wrist to stop him. 

Louis tensed. Oh, God, he was going to hurt him. Mr. Sex-On-Legs was going to hurt Louis. He should have just said thank you and moved on. Surely he wasn’t going to be another Declan, right? He was too beautiful to be another Declan. 

“Who are you?” Louis finally asked, feeling the fear course through his system as the hand securing his wrist hadn’t let up. His eyes became misty, praying to whoever would listen for this man not to hurt him too. Louis was mildly aware that onlookers were watching the scene unfold and perhaps nothing would happen with witnesses around.

“My name is Harry and I’m sure you know my last name from Professor Kip,” Harry introduced. “And for future, I could never and _would_ never hurt you or anyone else for that matter.”

Despite words from Mr. Adon--Harry, Louis was still wary. He’s learned not to trust someone at first sight. They could be anyone. Declan was proof of that. Louis simply nodded, giving a small smile as he clutched his bag tighter. He just wanted to get to class and forget this altercation ever happened. He was certain he was late if the lingering passerbys scurrying to class were anything to go by. 

“Sorry, but I have to go,” Louis quickly said as he side-stepped Harry and rushed off to his next class. 

**Harry’s POV**

Harry watched the boy scurry away, his head bowed as he avoided any unnecessary contact with other students. If Harry had to describe the pregnant man it would be that of an abused puppy. From what he’s gathered, something occurred in his past that’s left him mentally and most likely physically destroyed. No one should react the way the pregnant kid did when Harry tried to help him. The way he visibly recoiled, the outburst of not touching him...it was forlorning. It broke Harry’s heart. This boy was beautiful. With his tousled brunette hair and striking cerulean eyes, he could have been mistaken for a model. All the models would kill for his high cheekbones and flawless complexion. His features alone gave the kid an innocent look; almost too innocent. No one deserved to live a life in which one has to constantly look over their shoulder and it seemed that’s what this kid’s been doing all his life.

Harry was a keen observer. He was always a people watcher. You could tell someone’s personality just by watching them react independently or with someone for even five minutes. When Harry had seen the pregnant man’s bump peeking from the bottom of his shirt and the way he covered his belly when he went down, it confirmed Harry’s suspicions. Unfortunately, the guy looked so thin and frail, almost like he hadn’t eaten in days, which Harry assumed was definitely not ideal for a growing fetus. Was the baby getting enough nutrients? Was the parent? All these unanswered questions bothered Harry and he desperately wanted to help. Harry had spoken to Professor Kip, getting the kid’s name before he exited the Liberal Arts building. Perhaps he could gather some insight on a one Louis Tomlinson. Harry grabbed his phone and searched through his contacts.

“Hey, Eliza, I need a favor from you. Can you lookup a name for me and send me the file?”

“Of course, Mr. Styles, what is the name?” Eliza, Harry’s personal assistant, answered.

“Louis Tomlinson. He attends Columbia University, a third year student.”

Harry could hear the rapid typing through the phone, Eliza typing at record speed. “Ah, here we go, Mr. Styles,” Eliza chirped. “Louis Tomlinson, age twenty-two. Son of Johannah Poulston and Troy Austin. Mr. Tomlinson’s mother remarried to a man by the name of Daniel Deakin in 2014. They are currently married and reside in the suburbs of Chicago, Illinois with Louis’ six siblings.”

“Great work, Eliza. Do you have an address of where Louis’ currently living?” 

“Yes, sir. He currently resides on the fifth floor in an apartment located in Bronx, New York. Address is 250 Bedford Park Boulevard.”

Harry pursed his lips trying to remember the location, cringing when realization dawned. “That’s the poverty-stricken area of New York City, isn’t it?”

“Correct, sir,” Eliza responded. “That area is infected with drug lords and prostitutes along with low income families.”

“I know the area,” Harry muttered. “The question remains is why he lives in such a terrible area when his parents are more than capable of housing him in a nicer part of New York.”

“Mr. Tomlinson’s file does not answer those questions, sir, I apologize,” the woman murmured.

“Send me everything you find on Louis Tomlinson, Eliza, thank you,” Harry said curtly before ending the call.

So many thoughts flitted through Harry’s mind. How could someone attend a university as pristine and polished like Columbia but live in such an impoverished area. Did his parents disown him when he got pregnant? Did they blatantly refuse to help their son? Whatever the reason, Harry believed Louis truly deserved better.

Harry skipped his last two classes in favor of taking a detour to Louis’ apartment. This was borderline trespassing, maybe gave off the impression of a stalker, but Louis would never mention his living arrangement nor did he strike Harry as the type to let someone into his life. So if Harry had to trespass and be labeled a stalker, then damn it, he will be.


	3. Chapter 3

**Louis’ POV**

_2 Days Later…_

Louis jammed his key into the rusted lock of his apartment, muttering to himself when it stuck. Fucking Brock, his landlord promised Louis he’d get it fixed and that was six weeks ago. Brock was a nice man so he couldn’t stay upset at the guy for long. When the key finally turned, the door opening with a jerk and Louis nearly tripping into his apartment, he immediately sensed something was off. 

Fear infiltrated Louis’ body as he slowly closed the door and treaded lightly toward the kitchen, blindly looking for the lightswitch. Was someone in his house? Louis knew he was acting paranoid considering he lived in a studio apartment so everything was an open-floor plan. Still, Louis couldn’t shake the feeling as fear became the more prominent emotion and his eyes welled with tears. When Louis finally found the switched and the room flooded with dim lighting, he found a piece of paper attached to a white bag.

Someone had been in his house! Christ! His heart raced, wondering if said intruder was still inside. He snatched the note off the bag and read the messy scrawl.

_You and your baby could use the help_

Louis’ eyes widened. Louis and his baby? Whoever knew about his pregnancy had been in his home. Anyone Louis has come in contact with since he started showing knows so that doesn’t help narrow down the suspects. Was he being stalked? Could it be...no. No, no, no. He’s in jail. He can’t get out. He’s put away. Declan’s parole officer would have told Louis if Declan escaped. 

Louis suddenly felt sick, his small lunch threatening to come up as he rushed to the sink and emptied the contents of his stomach. Lately, he hadn’t been able to keep anything down and with what little food he was eating, he knew his baby was suffering. He’d be to blame if his child was born malnourished. He’s a struggling college kid who unintentionally got pregnant. What the fuck was he supposed to do? On top of all the other shit he has to worry about, he was barely in his second trimester. Surely by his third, he wouldn’t fit any of clothes and then he’d be properly ucked. Every little bit he had left over went to food or some type of utility bill. There was no room for new clothes in his budget.

Louis groaned as he rinsed his mouth and the sink of his sick, his legs trembling from fatigue. He grabbed a water from the fridge, startled when he saw it stocked to the brim of fresh fruits, veggies, and assorted meats. Louis’ eyes widened as he grabbed the sirloin off the first shelf and gaped at the price. Fifteen dollars a pound? Holy shit. He set the meat back on the shelf and opened the drawer finding an assortment of cheeses, eggs, and other condiments. This was all too generous. Louis couldn’t accept this. Surely, he couldn’t. But... he would never be able to afford all this and he couldn’t let the food go to waste. Christ, the amount of food in here would last Louis a good few months.

If his fridge was full, did that mean...Louis rushed to the cabinets, gasping when they were full too. What used to be scarce cans of soup were now replaced with boxes of cereals, oatmeal, and a variety of soups and spices. There were two loaves of bread with jars of peanut butter and jam next to them. That alone could last louis for a few months. 

As Louis stared astonishly at the full cabinets and fridge, his eyes welled with tears of endearment. Whoever did this had to have spent at _least_ four hundred dollars on groceries alone. Louis’ attention finally caught the large bag on his counter and walked over to it, rereading the note that was attached before opening the bag and removing its contents. There were a handful of prenatal vitamins and over the counter medications for aches and pains. 

No. Absolutely not. Louis couldn’t accept any of this. His beneficiary, whoever this person was, had a heart made of gold and he had nothing to give in return. Louis would like to know who the person in question was. Louis was determined to get to the bottom of this.

Louis dug through one of his tattered boxes, finding a hoodie that had always been baggy on him and quickly slipped it on. He grabbed his Chuck Taylor’s with the souls worn and laced them up before leaving his apartment, making sure to lock it up before going up two floors to Brock’s door, wrapping on the door lightly. Louis impatiently waited, arms folded tight across his chest and his nose buried in the crooks to stay warm. There was no heater in the hallways, hell there was no heater in _any_ of the rooms. 

There was a loud thump followed my muffled curses before the door swung open and furious brown eyes bore holes into Louis’ startled blues. The pregnant lad visibly flinched, taking a step back. Upon realization of the culprit at the door, Brock’s facial expressions softened immediately.

“Hey, Louis, is something wrong?” he asked tiredly. Shit, Louis didn’t mean to wake up the poor guy. He rarely knew Brock’s schedule, only communicating with the older man whenever rent was due.

“Uh...sort of?” Louis said awkwardly, uncrossing his arms and fidgeting with his fingers. “I...um, just wanted to know….who you allowed into my apartment? You’re the only one with spare of keys and I wasn’t exactly robbed, so…” Louis quickly averted Brock’s gaze. Louis was never too fond of confrontation.

Brock’s eyes brightened a bit at the information and nodded. “Oh, yeah, I remember. Some rich guy and another man flashing a badge came by earlier today.

Louis furrowed his brows. A rich guy and another man with a badge. Were they IRS? FBI? Special Ops? Maybe it was someone from the adoption agency. So many possibilities and yet, not a bloody step closer to who the hell was in Louis’ apartment.

_Here comes the nausea,_ Louis thought. He muttered a quick thanks to his landlord before he rushed toward the stairwell, taking the stairs back down to his apartment as quickly as he could, feeling the bile creep up his throat. This was more than nausea, Louis was panicking and his vision was tunneling. By the time he reached his floor, two figures were standing by his apartment door and Louis shrieked. 

Louis had to have witnessed a murder and someone was coming to kill him, right? Why else would there be two gastly men standing by his apartment. It could be the tunnelling vision or the fact that he could barely breathe. Perhaps he was hallucinating? Whatever the case, Louis’ vision swirled and unconsciousness was calling his name. _Louis, Louis, Louis._ His subconscious suspiciously sounded like Harry’s name. _Louis. Louis, are you okay?_ There it was again. Louis’ mind was clouded, his breathing becoming more ragged the further he tried to escape his tormentors. Louis briefly caught sight of the the two figures closing in before darkness finally consumed him.

Louis felt warm, almost too warm. It was a comfortable warmth and Louis welcomed it happily. Was the heater finally fixed in his building? When did Brock have time to repair it? Louis didn’t remember making it back to his apartment? Louis felt like he was on a cloud. Everything felt fuzzy, like he was in the void between life and death. 

When Louis finally came to, blinking the sleep from his eyes, his surroundings were foreign. There was a faint, steady beat of a monitor echoing behind him and the sterile stench of a hospital room was pungent in his nose. A hospital. He was in a hospital, that much Louis could gather. But why? How the hell did he end up here? Did he deliver his baby? Louis’ eyes immediately dropped to his belly, sighing in relief when he felt his bump. _Oh, thank God._

“Oh, Mr. Tomlinson, you’re awake!” A petite woman wearing purple scrubs chirped as she bustled into the room.

Louis blinked dazedly, trying to follow the woman’s movements, but she was moving too quickly it was giving him a headache to keep up. Louis glanced at the monitors and at the ivy taped to his hand before he stared at the woman, hoping she’d provide some insight as to how the hell he got here.

“A very nice gentleman brought you to the hospital,” she answered Louis’ unspoken questioned. “You were severely dehydrated and your baby showed signs of malnutrition.”

“That’s not true!” Louis croaked in defense, finding his throat dry. “I would never starve my baby.” Who was she to accuse him of starving his child. “I’m doing my best to keep me and my baby fed…”

The woman smiled sadly as she continued to check Louis’ monitors and vitals. “The man who brought you in explained your situation, Mr. Tomlinson. The doctors know you weren’t intentionally starving your child. You can relax.”

Who explained his situation? What nice gentleman? Who was this mysterious benefactor? Brock couldn’t provide a proper explanation as to who he allowed into his home and here again, the same gentleman, so Louis assumes, brought him to the hospital as well. What the _fuck_ was going on?

“Who explained everything? No one knows about me or my child.”

“He’s sitting in the waiting room, Mr. Tomlinson,” the nurse answered. “He wanted me to inform him when you woke up. Would you like me to get him for you?”

Louis wasn’t sure if he wanted to meet this man of mystery--his recent benefactor, but if he didn’t meet him now, he’d probably never know the man behind such kind acts. “S-Sure?” The nurse smiled and patted Louis’ leg before exiting the room. Louis sighed and rubbed his belly, pursing his lips as he waited for any sign of movement. He smiled when he felt the flutters and sighed in relief. “I’m so sorry, little baby. I didn’t mean to put you through so much stress. I’m trying my hardest to keep you healthy.”

There was a light rap at the door, pulling Louis’ attention from his belly and tensed when his gaze met Harry’s. Of _course_ he was the one who brought him here and most likely the one that broke into his apartment and stocked his shelves full of food. While Louis found Harry’s antics endearing, his eyes narrowed with annoyance at the lanky man.

“Why the hell did you bring me here?” Louis snapped.

Harry blanched at Louis’ outburst before schooling his face to a stoic expression and stepped further into the room, grabbing the nearest chair and setting it by Louis’ bed. “You passed out, Louis,” Harry sighed as he sat down. “What else was I supposed to do?”

“Leave me there until I woke up,” Louis responded stubbornly.

“And risk you _and_ your child getting mugged or possibly worse?” Harry scoffed. “Not a chance in hell.”

_The worst has already happened,_ Louis thought. _You can’t save me._ “Well, thanks to you, I’m going to be thousands of dollars in debt with this hospital stay. I’m going to get kicked out of my apartment for not being able to afford rent and I’m not gonna have enough for food…” Lous rambled, thinking of all the turmoil that accompanied the soon-to-be debt he’d incur.

“Your stay has been covered,” Harry interrupted.

Louis’ eyes shot up in astonishment, finally seeing Harry properly for the first time since they first interacted. Had his eyes always been this green? _Focus, Louis, you’re supposed to be pissed at this man._

“I can’t allow that,” he argued. “I’m fine, I’ll be okay.” Louis sighed and started messing with the wires and straps on his stomach and hands, trying to take them off his body before a pair of hands stilled Louis’.

 

“Just accept that help, Louis,” Harry admonished. With a futile attempt, Louis finally stopped fighting Harry’s grasp and let his hands drop to his sides with a pout.

Why should he accept the help? This man was another classmate in Louis’ class. He’s known this man existed in a matter of a few days. Was he some charity case to Harry? What was this man’s gain? Why help a random pregnant kid?

“Why? I don’t need the bloody he--

\--Oh, come off it!” Harry finally raised his voice causing Louis to flinch. “Look at yourself, Louis.”

“Fuck you,” the pregnant lad hissed. “I don’t need your fucking help. Not those pills, not that food, and certainly not this damned hospital stay!” If Louis had his way, he’d find a way to pay Harry back. Even if the circumstances to pay Louis back were extreme.

Louis suddenly felt self-conscious the way Harry glared at him and subconsciously tried to make himself smaller against the bed. Louis refused to meet Harry’s eyes, toying with the hem of the scratchy blue blanket. He had so many questions for Harry. Just who was this man and why did he have the clearance to get keys from his landlord and all too willingly supply Louis’ shelves and _then_ have the decency to pay for his hospital stay?

“Why are you doing all this for me, Harry?” Louis finally asked with a sigh, sounding defeated.

Harry almost looked put off by Louis’ question, maybe even offended that he’d question his generosity. “Why not? You’ve been dealt a rough hand and everyone deserves a break once in awhile.”

Louis narrowed his eyes, tossing his guard up. No matter how generous Harry was, no matter how sweet he was being at this moment, every man had a nefarious side and Louis refused to let his guard down, even for a moment and get destroyed yet again.

“What do you want from me in return?”

Harry’s eyes widened before they narrowed. “Seriously? You think I’m doing this to get something out of you? Is that what you really think of anyone who tries to help you? Why can’t you accept that maybe I’m just a nice person who enjoy helping people!” Harry snapped.

Louis flinched at Harry’s tone but quickly recooperated, staring at the man and the way his chest rose and fell rapidly from his rant, his eyes soft and...upset? Had Louis just hurt his feelings? It wasn’t intentional. He was only trying to protect himself.

With a different approach, Louis grabbed Harry’s hand between the both of his and spoke, “I appreciate your gratuity, Harry, but I can’t accept any of this. My past has led me to struggle with letting people in and trusting them. If let you in or let my guard down, I’m afraid I’ll get hurt and I don’t want to go down that road again.” There was more to Louis’ statement but he couldn’t bring it upon himself to tell Harry his entire life or the inner demons he faced on a day to day basis. 

Harry pursed his lips, eyes dropping to his hand in Louis’ before he finally nodded. “Consider my gratuity gifts from an anonymous tip then, yeah?” Before Louis had a chance to accept or deny Harry’s request, the tall man was out of his seat and out of the room.

Louis sighed. He could never win. He tried to be honest and upfront; explain his reasoning behind his introvertness and Harry _still_ managed to be upset. Now, don’t get Louis wrong, he’s extremely grateful for what Harry’s done for him but if Harry expects to be more than a passing acquaintance in Louis’ life, then that man was going to be severely disappointed.


	4. Chapter 4

_A Month Later_

Thanks to Harry, Louis had managed to gain ten pounds and Louis was debating on whether or not to be pissed that he was starting to get fat or grateful that his baby wasn’t starving anymore. Louis supposed the latter seemed the most logical. Now the biggest challenge at the moment was finding the extra cash to purchase some bigger jeans now that his stomach was rounding out. On top of that, his car started to show signs of shutting down, so automotive expenses were looming as well. Louis will probably never catch a break.

Louis slipped on his old gray peacoat, the buttons straining to hold itself together. Louis figured he’ll have another week before he won’t be able to wear it anymore. His high school sweatshirt no longer fit courtesy of his growing child and his t-shirts were on the verge of giving up too. He desperately needed to find a couple side jobs so he could afford a few new clothes. 

With a sigh, Louis adjusted the beanie on his head and wrapped the plaid scarf around his neck. New York winters were brutal and the season was just around the corner which meant the weather now was becoming dangerous for any civilian walking the streets for even five minutes. With the weather changing, it meant icy nights and piles of blankets to stay warm. Luckily, the baby was due at the end of winter so at least they won’t have to experience the brunt of the frigid season.

Louis locked up his apartment and waddled to the elevator. Thank God Brock took pity on the pregnant lad and made an effort to finally get the damned thing fixed. Walking up and down five flight of stairs in the next few months were going to be difficult. His waddle was getting worse and no matter how many times he tried to correct his walk, it _always_ reverted back to a waddle.

Louis exited his building and into the blistering weather and sprinted toward his car. He rubbed his hands together when he got inside, puffing hot breaths between them in attempt to warm them up before he stuck his key into the ignition and got a clicking sound in return. _Are you kidding me?_ Louis tried his car again, his car making repeating its failure. _Fuck!_ Louis gave up after turning his ignition a fourth time and slapped the steering wheel before bowing his head in defeat. _Another problem I have to deal with._ Irritated, Louis yanked his key out of the ignition, gathered his bag and belongings and started the treacherous walk toward the bus stop. He’d definitely be late for school and hopefully his professor would talk pity on him due to his condition.

Louis kept his head down and held his bag tight to his body as he shuffled past other patrons trying to hurry out of the cold. Walking alone on New York streets was never the best idea, especially if one looked as vulnerable as Louis did. As Louis walked the pavement, occasionally looking at his surroundings when a car suddenly pulled up alongside the curb and Louis’ breathing immediately picked up. Oh, God, he was going to get mugged or worse, kidnapped!

“Louis,” came Harry’s voice as the car rolled to a stop. 

Louis’ head snapped up at the familiar voice and he clutched his chest. “Christ, you scared me! What, are you stalking me now?”

“No?” Harry laughed, putting his car in park. “This is my usual route to school and I happened to see you so I pulled over.”

Louis nodded and stared at the luxurious car. Harry owned the latest Audi A5 only he souped it up with blackout windows and LED lighting. The car was beautiful. It definitely outshone Louis’ 2005 Honda Accord. Harry was rich, that was a given. Well, so was Louis but he refused to let his parents invest in his life since he was an adult after all and he’d make his own way.

Louis stared at Harry through the open window, briefly wondering if Harry noticed him gawking over his prized possession. “Yeah, well, I have a bus to catch.”

“Where’s your car?”

“Won’t start.” Louis shrugged, adjusting his bag on his shoulder, something Louis found himself doing when he was in an awkward position or uncomfortable. 

Harry pursed his lip sand glanced at the stop sign in front of him before he turned his gaze back to Louis, emerald eyes peering into cobalt intensely. The gaze made Louis tense up, the pregnant lad shifting from one foot to the other. 

“Let me give you a ride. We’re going to the same school after all so you can’t give me an excuse,” Harry snickered.

Louis chewed on his lip, pondering the decision. The bus stop was five minutes away and would take at least a couple of hours before it even reached the university. And Harry was right here, patiently waiting and willingly wanting to help Louis. 

“Erm…” Louis fidgeted with his scarf, avoiding Harry’s pretentious stare.

“Louis, I’m not going to hurt you, I promise. It’s an innocent ride to school,” Harry assured, voice genuine.

“I’m sorry, but no,” I quickly responded before hurrying down the street. Louis could hear Harry curse in frustration before the Audi roared to life and moved the few feet down the street. Louis wouldn’t be surprised if Harry followed Louis the entire way to school.

“Come on, Louis, be reasonable,” Harry sighed. “You’re pregnant and walking by yourself alone in a part of New York that’s dangerous. Plus its negative degrees out!”

Harry had a point and Louis didn’t want to admit that he was right. On top of that, Louis’ feet _were_ aching and the lecherous stares he was getting from some of the men passing by were making him apprehensive. 

With a reluctant sigh and a glance at his worn out shoes, Louis finally peered up at Harry and nodded. “Alright.” Louis opened the door, the heat welcoming as he sat in the passenger seat and grabbed his seatbelt. Oh, god, the seats had warmers, too. It felt great on his sore back as he closed his eyes and relished in the warmth for a moment. 

Harry only chuckled and drove away from the curb toward the university. The silence was oddly comfortable and Louis was glad Harry didn’t engage in conversation. Louis was awkward when it came to conversations and if he could live his entire life without communicating with others, he’d be happy.

Harry finally spoke up a quarter of the way to school, breaking the comfortable silence and startling Louis. “Do you know what you’re having?”

Louis snapped his gaze up to Harry, a bit taken aback at the question. He was the first person to ask Louis anything about his child. “No, I don’t, actually. I rather not know.”

“Why not? What about names and putting a nursery together? Don’t you want a theme that’s gender specific?”

“That’s up to the adoptive parents,” he blurted out. Damnit. No one was supposed to know a damned thing about Louis and he just told Harry, who was still a stranger to him despite his generosity.

“Well, then, whoever the baby is placed with will be a lucky family,” Harry responded without pause, flashing a sweet smile. 

Louis couldn’t help but smile softly and stared out the passenger window. “Yeah, they will be.”

**Harry’s POV**

Harry kept staring at Louis tentatively. His heart broke at how lost Louis appeared. It almost seemed as if he was so upset with the world and seemed to disassociate himself from any and everyone he came in contact with. Louis definitely had his guard up all the time and Harry was certain it wasn’t healthy. Harry had read in his file that he had gone to trial for an incident that occured in the past Harry couldn’t bring it upon himself to delve deeper into the situation and betray Louis’ trust and private life. If he could become Louis’ friend, the kid will tell Harry what happened in his own time.

Harry pulled into the parking garage of the university and cut the engine. “What time is your last class?”

Louis furrowed his brows as if trying to figure out what game Harry was playing at before realization washed over his face. “I can take the bus home, but thanks for the offer.”

Harry sighed and set his keys in the cup holder before turning his body toward Louis completely. “You know I can’t allow that. The nearest bus stop is a mile from here and in your condition it’s not safe.”

Louis gave an exasperated sigh, tossing his hands up in defeat. “Alright, I’ll bite. My last class ends at 2:20.”

Harry only smiled victoriously and unlocked the doors. “I’ll be right here. I expect to see you here as well?”

Louis nodded albeit reluctantly, keeping his gaze on Harry’s as he fumbled with the door handle and finally let himself out. When he was alone in his car, the silence left Harry to his thoughts. Louis looked so exhausted and constantly in pain. He couldn’t imagine the pain he was in if what his sister said about the aches and pains that accompanied pregnancy was anything to go by. 

Harry watched as Louis waddled toward the Liberal Arts building before falling into queue with the rest of the students rushing to get to class. He couldn’t help but smile as he found Louis’ waddle adorable. He’s certain Louis would skin him alive if he told him those words. Either way, it was adorable. _Louis_ was adorable. Harry just wished Louis saw himself the way Harry did. He was beautiful and courageous and insanely smart. He’s listened to Louis’ input during the lectures and the passion for English could rival that of English scholars. He had a knack for criticism and theory for the English language.

Harry eventually left his car and headed toward his class. He took the stairs to the third floor when he suddenly heard a loud slap followed by the sound of dropped textbooks. Harry’s first thought was Louis as he ran toward the sound, winding around the corner to find the man in question hunched over on the floor and his books scattered around. 

“Louis!” Harry gasped, dropping to his knees next to the pregnant lad. Louis trembled next to Harry as he whimpered something incoherent. Harry reached out to touch his shoulder and the kid jerked his shoulder away. “Louis, hey, it’s me. It’s Harry.”

Louis slowly glanced up, peering into concerned green eyes as if he was confirming it was Harry and not someone else. Harry offered a comforting smile as he held out his hand for Louis to take. Louis stared at the hand in question momentarily before finally accepting it. 

Harry helped Louis to his feet before retrieving his books off the floor and handing them back to him. Louis hovered near Harry as the taller man glanced around seeing students standing around and whispering amongst themselves regarding the altercation. Harry’s blood boiled at the scene. He didn’t know what the hell happened considering he arrived toward the end of the incident but he’d definitely find out.

“What the hell are you staring at?” Harry spat. “It must be nice to be so fucking perfect all the time!” 

The crowd among them scattered instantly leaving a few students lingering as well as Harry and Louis in the nearly empty hallway. Louis mumbled a quiet ‘thanks’ before he stared up at Harry with somber blue eyes. 

“Let’s get you cleaned up, yeah?” Harry murmured before taking Louis’ messenger bag off his shoulder and slinging it over his own before leading Louis to the nearest bathroom. 

Louis remained silent as they entered the bathroom, Harry setting Louis’ bag on the counter just as the pregnant lad rushed to one of the stalls and dropped to his knees. He retched into the porcelain bowl causing Harry to flinch from the sound. Harry walked over to Louis, crouching down and placing a hesitant hand on his back as the kid continued throw up his breakfast. 

“Louis?” Harry tried, Louis flushing the toilet before leaning against the stall wall. He closed his eyes momentarily as his hands trembled from the fatigue. “What happened out there?”

Louis’ eyes snapped open and he stared at Harry with wide, panicked eyes before he started to properly sob. It startled Harry at the sudden outburst as he watched the man before him clutch is belly protectively and try to sputter out a response. “I’m so clumsy a-and I tripped over mys-self! The b-baby hasn’t moved since I fell!”

Harry nodded, acknowledging Louis’ response and hovered his hands over Louis’ belly. “May I?”

Louis reflexively cringed away from Harry, eyes darting between his face and hands. “F-For what?”

“To see if the baby’s okay,” Harry reassured. “That’s all.”

Louis visibly swallowed and nodded slowly, unbuttoning his peacoat with trembling fingers and exposing his round belly clad in a faded blue t-shirt. Judging on the size of Louis’ belly, Harry estimated that Louis was at the end of his second trimester and shortly entering his third. Harry was only a pregnancy savant due to spending every waking moment when his sister Gemma was pregnant with his niece. 

“It hasn’t moved at all?” Harry asked, starting at Louis intently. Louis shook his head as a few tears trickled down his cheeks. Harry pursed his lips as his eyes returned to his belly. He placed both hands on either side Louis’ bump hoping to feel _something._

Suddenly, there was a light tap against Harry’s left hand and his eyes brightened, quickly shooting up to Louis’. The expression on Louis’ face was unlike anything Harry’s ever seen from him. His features were relaxed while the muscles around his mouth threatened to form a smile.

“It m-moved!” Louis gasped as more tears fell from his eyes, this time from relief and joy. “The baby moved!”

Harry chuckled lightly and nodded as he stared at Louis rubbing his bump and giving a croaky laugh. Smiling and laughing suited Louis and Harry wished he’d see that more often. Louis’ relieved, wet eyes met Harry’s bright ones and for a split moment, the world seemed to stop, as if Harry was seeing Louis in a completely new light. Louis seemed to reciprocate the feeling because his gaze dropped from Harry’s as his cheeks flushed. 

Did they just have a moment? Was a new bond forming? Or was it the fact that maybe Harry was falling for this introverted kid? Harry didn’t want to draw that conclusion considering it’s only been a month since they’ve communicated but damn the time. Harry was falling for him.


	5. Chapter 5

**Louis’ POV**

Louis’ eyes gazed into Harry’s own, shedding new light on this figure. Perhaps everyone wasn’t terrible. Was there a possibility that Harry could be the one percent of all assholes who graced this earth and actually be a decent man? _No! No, Louis, you’re not letting him in! Not under any circumstance._

When Louis finally realized the predicament he was in; sitting on the floor with Harry’s hands pressed to his belly, he suddenly panicked. He shoved Harry’s hands away and scrambled to get off the floor. “L-Leave me alone!” Louis shrieked as he gripped the stall door to upright himself. Harry startled at Louis’ sudden mood change. “I appreciate the help but I can’t, Harry. I just can’t.” Louis wasn’t making sense, he knew that, but he needed to get away from Harry; needed to clear his clouded mind. 

“Louis, wait!” Louis heard Harry call after him but he was already halfway down the hall, buttoning up his jacket and walking as quickly as his pregnant self would allow.

The moment Louis made it outside the Liberal Arts building and rounded a corner, he doubled over and vomited on the asphalt. He groaned when his stomach finally settled as it took every fiber in Louis’ being not to breakdown for what seemed like the hundredth time today. When Louis felt composed enough to walk, he trotted down the steps and started the long walk to the bus stop in blistering weather. He made a mental note to email his professor that he’d miss class today. Louis was honestly not in the mood nor had the energy to sit through a lecture. 

Gratefully, Louis only had to wait ten minutes before the next bus arrived as he boarded the vehicle, paid his toll, and found a seat near the back. A million thoughts ran through Louis’ mind and he felt as if his life was going too fast to grasp onto. Here he was just trying to get through these next few months so he could deliver his child and placing him with a family that he knew would provide only the best for him. But of course reality had to throw him a curve ball by tossing Harry into his life and all in all Louis’ just...lost. He’s lost at the fact that this man wants to help him with no personal gain for himself. Louis understood that there _are_ good men out there, he just refused to believe it especially after Declan.

“Hold the bus!” Louis heard a bystander call before the bus suddenly stopped, causing the patrons to jerk forward as the doors swung open and let the passenger on. Louis kept his eyes glued to the window, staring up at the greying sky. 

There was a gust of wind as a warm body plopped down beside him and Louis mentally cursed to himself. Of all seats available on the bus, who the _fuck,_ decided it was appropriate to sit next to Louis? Louis pressed himself closer toward the window in attempt to keep his distance from the stranger. 

“You left your bag in the bathroom,” came Harry’s deep voice causing Louis’ head to whip toward his direction. 

“What are you doing here?” Louis asked wearily, his body relaxing now that he knew the stranger next to him wasn’t actually a stranger.

“You forgot your bag?” He repeated, holding up the item for emphasis.

Louis didn’t know how to respond to that. Granted it was a kind gesture to rush to the bus to return Louis’ bag to him, but the lanky man didn’t need to do that. “Why do you care so much about what happens to me, Harry?” Louis suddenly blurted out. 

Louis didn’t intend to sound so panicky and a bit off-put with his question, but honestly, why _did_ Harry care so bloody much? Harry didn’t owe Louis anything. He was just another classmate in his English class. Certainly the other students didn’t show this much concern for the pregnant man.

Louis was so confused and he didn’t understand. He was perfectly content being an introvert. He wished he could return to being invisible—wished Harry never noticed him; wished Harry didn’t have to see just how broken Louis was. 

Harry blanched at Louis’ question and stared at him intently. “Because no one deserves to be alone.”

“I like being alone,” Louis muttered.

“No, you don’t, Louis,” Harry argued.

**Harry’s POV**

“Yes I do!” Louis snapped at Harry and the taller man sighed exasperatedly. 

For a while now Harry had noticed Louis’ behavior and the way he’d react whenever someone offered their help. Yes, he was alone and though he claimed to prefer it that way, Harry knew no one _wanted_ to be alone. Louis needed help, he was just afraid to ask for it. That or he felt as if he’d impose or be a burden if he did. 

Harry pursed his lips and turned toward Louis so he was properly facing him. “I see you walk these halls every day, Louis,” Harry exclaimed. “Not a single smile, always shuffling your feet, head bent, and keeping to yourself. And all for what, Louis? What happened that you won’t let anyone into your life?”

Louis fiddled with his thumbs and gnawed on his bottom lip. “Nothing happened,” he whispered, guarded.

It was a lie. Harry knew it was a lie. No one looked this miserable for no reason and Harry wouldn’t push it. Harry _could_ snoop through Louis’ records and put the pieces together but that would only delay his attempts at trying to be his friend. It would probably be a one-way ticket to hell for Harry and lose all trust from Louis.

“Okay,” Harry finally relented. He set his hands in his lap and sat forward, staring out the opposite window.

Twenty maybe thirty minutes might have passed before Harry felt a dead weight against his side and turned to see Louis snoring softly, his brunette hair falling in strands around his face. His cheeks were rosy from the cold and in all reality he looked beautiful despite the exhaustion. His hands rested on his jacket-clad belly in a protective gesture and Harry couldn’t help but smile fondly. Despite the cards that Louis’ been dealt in the last few months, the amount of love he had for his unborn child never wavered.

When Louis’ apartment complex came into view, Harry debated on waking him up but decided against the latter and let him sleep. The pregnant man could use all the sleep he could get. He slung Louis’ bag over his shoulder and bent down to scoop the skinny man into his arms bridal style, earning a few glances from other patrons.

Harry carried Louis the entire mile to his apartment complex with ease. He made a mental note to thank Gustavo for the grueling workout sessions he’d attend four times a week because they certainly paid off. Harry balanced Louis in his arms as he fumbled in Louis’ bag for his house keys and finally entered the apartment, a gust of icy air knocking Harry in the face. Was there no heat? How the hell did Louis survive the winters?

Harry gently lay Louis down on his bed and piled the blankets on top of him after removing his pea coat and scarf. It was a miracle the pregnant man hadn’t woken up through all the jostling. Perhaps Harry underestimated just how sleep deprived Louis truly was.

Harry smiled to himself as he brushed a few stray strands out of Louis’ face and admired the sleeping man. He looked peaceful when he slept; not a care in the world. He was breathtaking. Harry pursed his lips and stroked his cheek before standing up and tidying around his flat. He straightened up the few dishes in the kitchen and checked the fridge and cabinets to make sure he still had food. 

Harry grabbed the scattered clothes off the floor, coming across one particular shirt that was faded and torn. He glanced at the tag and frowned. An extra small? With the baby growing as rapidly as it was, there was no way Louis was still an extra small. Harry checked the rest of the sizes of clothes scattered on the floor, finding the same size on all his shirts.

It wasn’t Harry’s nature to pry despite the fact that his career revolves around prying into everyone’s business but Louis was tightlipped about his life and the struggles he endured. Prying was the only way he’d be able to help out the kid. Harry quietly rummaged through Louis’ closet, glancing at the few pieces of clothing he had on hangers. All the sizes were either an extra small or small and the items were so worn and torn or on the verge of losing its last stitch. He glanced at the pair of skinnies folded on a hanger and sighed. A size 28? That’s the smallest men’s jeans go and Gemma grew three pant sizes during her pregnancy. Certainly the jeans Louis was wearing now weren’t comfortable with his expanding stomach.

Louis needed a new wardrobe and Harry was going to help whether the pregnant man accepted it or not. He ripped a piece of paper out of Louis’ notebook and scrawled a quick message before locking the flat behind him and heading for one of the maternity stores on Fifth Avenue.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This man was going out of his way--going above and beyond to make sure Louis delivered a healthy baby and Louis’ been nothing but a total dick to him and for what? Harry’s done nothing but be sweet and polite. He’s shown no sign of malicious intent aside from the breaking and entering but Louis will let that slide on account of good intentions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter for you lovelies :)
> 
> As always, I love comments and kudos! Xx

**Louis’ POV**

Louis’ eyes fluttered open and scanned his surroundings. Stained walls, pale carpet, solid comforter. He was home and safely in his bed. Louis smiled in contentment and let his eyes flutter shut again before they snapped open upon realization. How the hell did he get home? The last thing he remembered was yelling at Harry on the bus. 

Louis threw his blankets off of himself and instantly realized his jacket and scarf had been removed. Oh god, had he been taken advantage of? Panic surged through him as he scrambled out of bed, keeping a hand under his belly as he rushed into the kitchen, a piece of paper lying on the counter grabbing his attention.

_I’ll explain everything when I return, so don’t panic. -H_

And he damn well better explain how the _hell_ he got to his apartment--how _Harry_ got into his apartment. Then again, Louis had an idea on how he got into his apartment considering his belongings were resting on the floor next to his bed and his keys were missing. After calming down when Louis started thinking rationally, he made himself a bowl of cereal and sat cross-legged on his bed. 

Louis was on his second bowl of Frosted Flakes when he heard the sound of _his_ keys jiggling into the lock before the door opened and Harry appeared. Last time Louis checked, he lived on his own, not with Harry. The audacity this man had to steal his keys and waltz in and out of this apartment as if he was the one paying rent!

Louis’ eyes narrowed at the three dark colored bags clutched in Harry’s hands. “What are those?”

Harry’s face brightened when he finally noticed Louis and had the grin to match. “Oh, good, you’re awake!”

“I am,” Louis confirmed, following Harry’s movements as he set the bags on the kitchen counter. “You want to explain to me why the hell you carried me home?”

Harry seemed startled by Louis’ sudden outburst as he turned around and handed Louis his keys. Louis was quick to snatch them from Harry as he glared viciously at the taller man.

“You looked exhausted and I didn’t want to wake you. Plus, I didn’t mind carrying you,” Harry explained. “I’m sorry I tried to help you.”

The way Harry expressed those words made Louis’ heart wrench with guilt. With a sigh, Louis maneuvered off his bed and waddled over to Harry and placed a hand on his shoulder. Louis was taking a leap of faith here putting his trust with this man for the time being and Louis hoped he wouldn’t get stepped on again.

“Look, Harry, I’m sorry,” Louis whispered, eyes drifting to the pale carpeting briefly before finally meeting Harry’s eyes. “I’m not used to the attention or the help. I appreciate all that you’ve done for me and making sure I’m alright, especially today with carrying me home and all.”

Harry smiled softly and grabbed Louis’ chin between his thumb and forefinger so Louis couldn’t look away as he gazed intently into the pregnant man’s eyes. “I don’t know what you’ve been through and I don’t know your past but from what I’ve gathered, it was a traumatic experience.”

Louis pursed his lips, exploring Harry’s features. His eyes were so green, Louis could get lost in them for _hours._ And that jaw. It was so sharp it could probably cut class. This man was insanely attractive; the epitome of perfection and _God_ did Louis want to know what it felt like to be _his._ Only Louis would never voice his thoughts out loud. He wasn’t quite ready to let another man back into his life.

When the gazing became too intense, Louis averted his gaze elsewhere. “I never want to relive that night again,” Louis whispered. Shit! Louis was saying too much. What the hell was he doing? Who told him it was fine to willingly release information to this man he barely knew. “Just don’t ask me about it.”

Harry quirked a brow and finally released Louis’ chin. “I wasn’t going to pry, Louis.”

This man was going out of his way--going above and beyond to make sure Louis delivered a healthy baby and Louis’ been nothing but a total dick to him and for what? Harry’s done nothing but be sweet and polite. He’s shown no sign of malicious intent aside from the breaking and entering but Louis will let that slide on account of good intentions. 

“Sorry,” Louis muttered, feeling guilty.

“I want to help you, Louis. I want to be your friend, that’s all,” Harry reassured. “Will you let me help you?”

Louis chewed on his bottom lip, staring at the lanky man standing inches from him. And what if Louis _does_ let him in, what will happen? He’ll be letting his guard down completely. Louis figured that if he plunged into this head on, he could face his fears and give Harry the benefit of the doubt. 

With a reluctant sigh, Louis finally nodded. He’ll let Harry help him. Louis was sure if he declined, Harry would help him anyway and it would be a pointless headache. 

Harry seemed pleased with Louis’ answer as he rounded the counter and crouched down to retrieve pots and pans. Louis leaned against the edge of the counter watching his new friend bustle around his little kitchen, grabbing spices out of the cabinet before he finally glanced up at Louis and smiled fondly.

“Why don’t you rest?” Harry asked, filling one of the pots with water and setting it on the stove.

Louis’ entire body hurt, primarily his back and feet and he was still exhausted. He had three and a half more months of this so he figured no matter how much sleep he got, it’d do nothing to alleviate the pains of pregnancy.

“Wouldn’t make a difference. I have three and a half more months of this,” Louis groaned, rubbing his sore back.

“And then what?” Harry asked wearily.

Louis’ movements halted upon Harry’s response and quirked a brow. “And then what? I mean, the baby will be born and go to a nice family.”

Harry nodded distractedly as he grabbed the pack of chicken breasts out of the fridge and set them in the sink. “Well, what do you want?

Louis furrowed his brows and crossed his arms over his chest. “What do you mean ‘what do I want’?”

Harry paused in the middle of cutting open the plastic packaging of the chicken to stare up at Louis. “Yeah. Do you want to give up your child?”

“I...uh…” Louis stammered. Louis wasn’t sure what he wanted right now. He hadn’t even glanced at the white binder that was burning holes into his messenger bag. A small part of Louis wanted to keep his baby, raise them to be better than his other father but the other part--the most dominant, was forcing him to make the right decision to place the baby up for adoption. It wouldn’t be fair to bring a child into the current living situation. His unborn baby deserved more than what Louis could provide. “I’m not entirely sure.”

Harry rinsed off the chicken breasts and set them in the pan, adjusting the burners before he leaned against the counter and crossed his arms over his chest. “Okay, let me rephrase. If you could afford this baby would you keep them?”

“Again, I’m not entirely sure,” Louis answered truthfully. Louis didn’t intend to get pregnant and he surely never pictured being a parent. Who in their right mind would trust Louis to be responsible for another human life? “When I realized I was gay, all thoughts of parenthood went out the window, you know? And then I was tested for uterine gene and it came back positive and voila, I’m a whale.”

“You’re not a whale,” Harry laughed. “People would kill to have your figure while pregnant.”

“Bullshit. You’re only saying that to make me feel better.”

“Is it working?” Harry smirked as he winked over his shoulder and went back to tending to the chicken.

“Maybe,” Louis muttered. Harry only chuckled and went about seasoning the food. As the aroma filled the apartment, Louis’ stomach growled in hunger. He couldn’t remember the last time he had a proper home cooked meal. “I’m gonna go take a shower.”

Louis quickly disappeared to the bathroom, grabbing a towel and a change of clothes on the way. He was enjoying Harry’s company way too much and he needed a space to just...breathe.

He sat on the toilet seat and scrubbed his hands down his face. _What am I doing? Why does Harry have to be so perfect? God, I can’t like him. He’s too perfect for someone like me._

Louis felt somewhat better after his shower. He stared at the filmy mirror, turning to his side to admire his large belly. It was definitely obvious he was pregnant and his stomach hung a little low. Didn’t they say you’re carrying a boy if you’re carrying low? Whatever the case, it didn’t matter. Louis was giving the baby up. With a resented sigh, Louis pulled his shirt over his chest, the shirt just barely covering his belly. He probably had a month left before this shirt would no longer fit, too. He was running out of clothes by the week. 

When Louis opened the door, he was met with the scent of Alfredo sauce and seasoned chicken and Louis’ mouth watered. Good God did that smell delicious. He tossed the towel on the floor before grabbing one of the blankets off his bed and wrapping it around his body as he stood by the counter. 

Louis admired Harry in his element. Cooking definitely suited him. He must have not noticed Louis returning because the older man was swaying his hips to some song in his mind, mouthing the lyrics and bopping his head. Louis couldn’t help but giggle, startling Harry out of his trance and whipping around with wide eyes and flushed cheeks. 

“How long have you been standing there?” Harry asked, flustered.

“Long enough,” Louis replied with a laugh. 

“Right, uh, well dinner’s ready,” Harry stuttered for a response trying to rid his embarrassment of just being caught dancing obnoxiously.

Louis accepted the plate Harry handed him of tortellini pasta with sliced chicken breast and four strips of asparagus. “Holy shit, this looks amazing.”

Harry made his own plate and joined Louis at the counter, handing the pregnant lad a fork. “I’ll take that as a ‘thank you’,” Harry praised.

“Thank you,” Louis murmured quickly, taking the fork from Harry and digging immediately. Louis’ eyes rolled back in pleasure at the rich taste of the creamy Alfredo sauce. “Oh good Lord, this is so good.”

“I’m glad you approve.”

And Louis definitely approved. It could have been the fact that he hadn’t had a proper meal in months or the fact that Harry was just an incredible cook. Either way, this meal was unlike anything he’s had. Alright, so maybe he was being biased and possibly melodramatic but sue him. He’s pregnant and hungry and was practically starving up until a few weeks ago.

As Louis ate, he chanced a glance over at Harry who stood next to Louis and ate his dinner quietly. Louis pursed his lips, suddenly feeling guilty that they had to stand and eat their food. “I’m sorry I don’t have a table.”

“I’m not worried about it,” Harry answered with a charismatic smile but Louis swore it looked borderline like a smirk. Harry Styles was up to something and Louis couldn’t pinpoint it. “And tomorrow’s Saturday.”

“Yeah, and?”

“And,” Harry said, dragging out the word. “I’m taking you shopping.”

Louis’ eyes widened in alarm and he dropped his fork on the plate, shaking his head frantically. Harry had done _more_ than enough to help Louis and his unborn child. Louis hadn’t forgotten the multiple shopping bags resting at the end of the counter either. “What? No, Harry, you can’t--

\--I can and I will, Louis,” Harry cut him off. “Your baby is growing faster than you can stay in your clothes and your furniture is outdated. You said you’d let me help you, so let me. Please?”

Louis let out a long sigh and muttered under his breath as he stared at the half-empty plate. “Clothes are one thing but furniture is taking it too far.”

“No, it’s not.”

“Yes, it is and you know it.”

The gaze Harry was fixing Louis with knew Louis had lost the battle. Louis didn’t have a choice in this matter as he tore his gaze from the taller man and returned to his meal. Fucking Harry Style and his persistence.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The pregnant man was woken up at ten by Harry pounding on his door and forty-five minutes later and half-awake with hot chocolate hastily shoved between his hands, Louis was in the passenger seat of Harry’s Audi on the way to the mall. Only Harry, as charming as he always is, surprised Louis with a buffet breakfast before they started their shopping day.

**Louis’ POV**

“Okay, try this one,” Harry said as he shoved another maternity top over the door to the dressing room.

Louis grabbed the striped polo from above and removed the hanger before wiggling into the shirt. He turned to the side, smoothing the fabric over is prominent belly and smiled. _Finally._ After the eighth attempt, Harry finally found something decent that he’d actually wear. Louis didn’t even know how he ended up agreeing to clothes shopping with Mr. Rich and Sexy. 

The pregnant man was woken up at ten by Harry pounding on his door and forty-five minutes later and half-awake with hot chocolate hastily shoved between his hands, Louis was in the passenger seat of Harry’s Audi on the way to the mall. Only Harry, as charming as he always is, surprised Louis with a buffet breakfast before they started their shopping day. 

Now, Louis was in the dressing room of Pea in the Pod, clothes scattered along the bench trying to find a few tops that looked appealing to him. Louis couldn’t imagine how difficult he’s been today and he feels guilty about it. It took Harry nearly fifteen minutes just to get Louis into the bloody store. The only reason Louis finally agreed was due to another pregnant man waddling out of the store with a satisfied grin on his face. 

“How does it fit?” Harry asked through the door, pulling Louis from his thoughts.

Louis startled at the voice, dropping his hands from his belly as if he had been caught doing a sordid act. He blushed upon realization that he was the only one in the dressing room and he could admire his belly as much as he wanted to in the privacy of the small space. Louis checked his appearance a second time before opening the door and stepping out, standing awkwardly in front of Harry awaiting his approval.

“I like that one on you,” Harry complimented, eyes bright and approving. “It accentuates your curves and slims what you don’t like. Louis flushed, not used to compliments and muttered a quiet ‘thanks.’ Harry gave Louis a wink making him flush and handed Louis the shirts that were in his hands. “Try these one while I go look for some jeans for you. What size are you?”

“Well, the ones I’m wearing are a twenty-eight and they’re getting too tight, so maybe one or two sizes up?” If Louis’ face went any redder, he was certain he’d be mistaken for a lobster. All the attention Harry was giving him was making him flustered and the compliments surely weren’t helping. Louis shouldn’t be embarrassed about rambling off his size or asking for a bigger size. He’s pregnant and gaining weight is part of the process. Plus, he was in a maternity store so it wasn’t as if they wouldn’t carry his size.

Harry must have noticed Louis overanalyzing himself or overthinking the situation because he didn’t question Louis’ answer nor argue. Instead, Harry gave Louis a fond smile and exited the dressing room lobby in search of maternity pants. Louis couldn’t help but stare after Harry’s ass clad in dark denim and the way it swayed when he moved. _No, Louis, focus! He’s only a friend. I can’t think of him that way._

Two hours later and three shopping bags full of new tops and jeans, Louis and Harry finally left Pea in the Pod. Louis kept his eyes glued to the floor as he kept his hands on his belly and followed alongside Harry through the mall. With each store they passed, Louis could feel Harry’s eyes burning a hole in the side of his face, ready to jump at the chance at buying Louis something else. Louis knew Harry was waiting for him to catch a glance at something else just to have an excuse to waltz into the store and buy said object so settling for the checkered floor would suffice.

“Let’s go in here,” Harry suddenly spoke up, steering Louis into a shoe store. “I’ve had my eye on a new pair of Vans.”

Thank God. At least Harry’s shopping for himself, too. It made Louis smile watching the way Harry’s eyes lit up at the display of Vans shoes on the wall. Every time Louis saw Harry he was always clad in skinny jeans and designer boots so seeing him express interest in actual tennis shoes was oddly comforting. Louis glanced around the massive store, each brand in its own corner. Louis waddled over to a pair of high top Chuck Taylor’s that were all black with leather trim. They were right up his alley. As a teenager, Louis owned every color Converse shoes known to man. Eventually, that phase died out but the love of Converse remained. When he left his parents to attend college, the luxury of purchasing more than one of pair shoes were left behind too and Louis sighed when he glanced down at his worn out black and white low top slip on Vans. 

Louis picked up the shoe and admired the style and the sleekness of the leather trim. They were so epic. “You like those?” A woman wearing a purple polo and black slacks asked, smile wide and most likely fake. She looked as eager as ever to make a sale and before Louis could respond, Harry was by his side, staring at the shoe in Louis’ hand.

“Converse, huh?” Harry snickered. “I’m not surprised. They suit your personality.”

“It’s all I used to wear before I went to college,” Louis commented quietly. The saleswoman hovered impatiently behind Louis and Harry and it mildly irritated the pregnant man.

“What size are you?” Harry asked, taking the shoe from Louis and handing it to Katie, as the nametag read, who looked to Louis anxiously. Christ, if this chick didn’t calm the fuck down.

Louis’ eyes widened and he shook his head. He knew what game Harry was playing out. “Harry, no…”

“Today’s about you, remember?” Harry reminded, placing an arm around Louis’ shoulders. The shorter male did his best not to flinch from the contact and stared up at Harry. The taller man must have felt Louis’ reaction because he quickly dropped his arm and took a step back as a silent apology. He pursed his lips at stared at Louis trying to gauge a proper reaction.

Louis noticed the sudden tension in the atmosphere and it made him slightly uncomfortable. He didn’t want to upset Harry by getting worked up over something that was clearly Louis’ own issue and smiled reassuringly, Harry seeming to deflate with relief.

“I’m getting you the shoes and you know I won’t take ‘no’ for an answer,” Harry beamed, his jubilant demeanor returning in full force. “So tell this wonderful lady, Katie, your shoe size so we can get them, okay?”

“Kay,” Louis whispered with a defeated sigh, acting like he had just been scolded. If Louis didn’t know any better, Harry was just as stubborn as Louis as the man in question smirked in triumph and disappeared back to the Vans wall.

“Your boyfriend’s pretty persistent isn’t he?” Katie giggled, setting the shoe back on the display case after copying down the shoe number. 

Louis’ eyes widened and he nearly choked on air over assumption. “H-He’s not my boyfriend.”

Katie’s eyes mimicked Louis’ own panicked ones and flushed with embarrassment. “Oh, my apologies, I had assumed, you know in your condition and the way he was so persistent about getting you the shoes--

\--that I was another queer?” Louis spat softly, eyes dropping to the floor as he tried to fight the tears. Louis will admit he came off a bit defensive and his words were probably a bit defensive but it was what she was thinking, right? That he was another queer who got knocked up? Two men, one being pregnant walking side by side in the mall doesn’t leave too much to the imagination. Katie tried to splutter an explanation but the hormones were already taking over and tears were burning to spill. “I-I’m sorry…”

Louis rushed out of the store as quickly as his heavy belly would allow, tears trekking down his face. Damn these bloody hormones and damn Katie. Louis could hear Harry calling after him before he started arguing with someone but the voices faded the further he tried to run away. 

Louis found the closest bathroom and dropped to his knees in a stall, vomiting up his large breakfast. Louis felt pathetic; sobbing and vomiting because he misinterpreted what someone said. He ran a shaky hand over his belly, the baby kicking frantically from its parent’s current mood.

“It’s okay, little one, I’m just a bit upset that’s all,” Louis whispered to his bump, leaning against the stall wall and trying to breathe evenly.

Louis heard the bathroom door open and close before footsteps echoed against the floor and approached the stall. Oh, God, Louis was going to get tormented for acting like a little bitch. Surely someone saw the incident unfold and now they were here to ridicule him. He should have never left his apartment. Going out in public was a terrible idea. Why the hell did he agree to this anyway?

Louis stiffened when the footsteps stopped at Louis’ stall and the door suddenly opened with a figure hovering in the doorway. Louis could feel their presence, they were so close and Louis waited anxiously for the impending torment. “Are you okay?”

Louis’ head shot up at the familiar voice, gasping when he saw Harry crouched down and arm extended as if he was trying to calm a cornered animal. For the first time in months, Louis felt the need and want to be held as he threw his arms around Harry’s neck, seeking the attention from the one person that seemed to care about him.

Since the incident with Declan and the news of his pregnancy, Louis was determined to do everything on his own. He was content being the suffer-in-silence type of college kid. All he had to do was go to school and work and make sure the baby made it to full term so he could return to his life before all this happened. 

But now, as he Louis clung to Harry and sobbed in his chest, he realized that needing help wasn’t such a bad idea. Especially when the other party willingly wanted to. Harry had been Louis’ rock these last few weeks and though he seemed stubborn and difficult at times, Harry never faltered; never gave up on him. All this pride bubbling inside Louis was all for nothing as he finally swallowed it and allowed the comfort he desperately needed.

Louis could sense the hesitation in Harry’s reaction when he tossed his arms around the taller male but his body relaxed as his own arms wrapped securely around the pregnant man. “Oh, Louis, it’s okay, I’m right here.”

Louis continued to sob into Harry’s chest as the taller male rubbed his back soothingly. “W-We should have never come to the mall.”  
“She had no right to assume anything, Louis. Katie felt terrible for setting you off but I set her straight.”

Louis gazed up at Harry with wide eyes and shook his head. “No, Harry, you shouldn’t have defended me. I _am_ a queer.”

“And so am I,” Harry argued. “Someone needed to defend who we were. We were as capable as anyone else to have lovers and children and some people are just ignorant.”

It shouldn’t have come to a surprise when Harry openly admitted he was gay, too, but it stole the breath right from Louis. He had a hunch about Harry but he didn’t want to assume. The way the tall male carried himself and the aura he exuded had the world believing he was another straight male. 

“You’re gay?” Louis blanched.

Harry’s mouth quirked into a smirk before he started laughing wholeheartedly. “Jesus, Louis, I thought it was pretty obvious. Yes, I’m gay and I’m proud of it.”

“You hid it so well,” Louis whispered.

Harry only laughed and shook his head in disbelief before helping Louis off the ground. “I’m as gay as they come, Louis. It’s the way I carry myself that leaves people open to interpretation I guess,” Harry explained as he grabbed a wad of toilet paper and handed it to Louis.

Louis accepted the tissue and wiped his face before tossing it away and washing his hands. “Well, any guy would be lucky to have you.”

Louis swore he saw Harry’s cheeks flush and it was a rare occurrence but each time it happened, Louis couldn’t help but giggle. “Yeah, well, I could say the same for you, Louis.”

The pregnant man shook his head quickly, bending down to retrieve some of the shopping bags while Harry grabbed the rest. “Who would want someone as damaged as me?”  
“I would,” Harry declared before disappearing out of the bathroom.

Harry’s confession froze Louis where he stood as he stared with wide eyes after the closed door. _He_ would date Louis? Harry Styles. Mr. Sex-On-Legs would date someone like Louis? This Adonis of a man had so many options and he’d settle for a damaged, impoverished, and overweight college student? Louis shook his head. He couldn’t believe someone like Harry would waste his days with the likes of Louis. Harry needed the life of luxury, right? Louis was nowhere near that life and he could never be in that life again.

Louis caught his reflection in the mirror and gaped at his frail frame with his large belly concealed in a tight t-shirt. In three and a half months he wouldn’t be pregnant anymore and maybe then he’d more attractive--be the person Harry would _truly_ want to be with. With Louis’ inner turmoil consuming him, he realized three and a half months wasn’t that far away and he desperately needed to find a family for his unborn child.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis nodded and gave a pained smile. His water had broke around two in the morning and though his first reaction was to call Harry now that they had become true friends, he couldn’t bring it to himself to bother the sexy man so early in the morning, especially since Harry had midterms today.

_Three and a half months later_

“Alright, Louis, it looks like you’re about four centimeters,” Jenna informed. She was a bubbly nurse that Louis had grown to love in the short time they’ve known each other since Louis had brought himself to the hospital. She removed her fingers and tossed the gloves into the nearby bin. 

Louis nodded and gave a pained smile. His water had broke around two in the morning and though his first reaction was to call Harry now that they had become true friends, he couldn’t bring it to himself to bother the sexy man so early in the morning, especially since Harry had midterms today. Thankfully, Harry had gotten Louis’ car fixed so he was relieved that he could drive himself to the hospital when he was sure the baby wasn’t in any hurry to be delivered.

So here he was, lying in a hospital bed, hooked up to so many wires and machines and to the naked eye they appeared overwhelming. If it weren’t for Harry’s involvement with the adoption process, Louis would have been plagued with anxiety in trying to find a family last minute. Of course, Mr. Adonis jumped at the chance to choose a decent family for Louis’ baby and while Louis wanted to protest, assure Harry that this was _his_ decision, Louis felt that it was probably best if he didn’t know who was going to raise his child. While to some that may sound so cruel and definitely not the proper way to handle things, Louis was an emotional person and if he met the family he’d be giving his child to he’d probably overanalyze the entire situation, finding every little issue with the family and recant his offer. Having Harry handle all this was definitely for the best.

Louis tensed, hands flying out to grab the railings as he felt another contraction wrack his body. He gritted his teeth, eyes welling up as the pain intensified. He breathed slowly, focusing on the posters taped to the door in front of him as the pain finally subsided and he relaxed into the bed. Holy fuck, how the hell did people deliver more than one child? These pains were a force to be reckoned with and definitely took top ten of all the pain Louis’ ever experienced.

Louis glanced at his phone resting on the small table and debated whether or not to disturb Harry. He honestly didn’t want to go through labor alone. He had seen movies and television shows were the females always had _someone_ holding their hand through labor and delivery and all in all, being the emotional support. Doing this on his own was incredulous and Louis was a proper idiot to think this wasn’t terrifying. The better half of Louis’ judgment prompted him to snatch his phone off the table and type Harry a quick message only the taller man seemed to beat Louis to the punch as Louis swiped at his phone to read Harry’s message.

_Where are you?_

_At the hospital. Water broke._

_On my way._

Just like that? Harry would drop everything to come be with Louis?

_No Harry. You have midterms._

_Doesn’t matter, I’m on my way._

A greater force would have to compel Harry to stay at school and finish his midterms if the adamant message was anything to go by. Louis wouldn’t be able to convince the man if he tried. Passing classes and midterms were far more important than sitting in a chair and watching someone go through hours--god, hoping not hours if Louis was concerned--of labor. But nonetheless, Louis knew Harry was stubborn and always seemed to get his way. In the last three months, Harry definitely showed proof of that.

Louis must have nodded off because the next time he woke up, Harry was sitting in a chair next to his bed. Harry’s face brightened when he realized Louis was awake and placed a strong hand over his. Louis visibly tensed at the contact but immediately relaxed, something Louis has learned to control whenever Harry would express any type of of affection. Louis squeezed Harry’s hand weekly and offered a tired smile. Who knew labor would be so draining?

“How are you feeling?” he asked. Louis tried to ignore the thumb caressing the top of his hand but he found the gesture comforting and it oddly kept him calm.

“Exhausted and sore and disgusting.”

“All common with labor and delivery,” Harry responded with a soft laugh.

“You should have stayed and finished your midterms,” Louis admonished though the heat wasn’t there. He was too tired to properly scold Harry.

“You shouldn’t be going through this alone,” was Harry’s rebuttal. “You should have called me when your water first broke.”

“I was fine, Harry. It was so early in the morning and you had midterms.”

“Fuck the midterms, Louis. I could always retake them. Fine or not, I’m here now and you’re not alone.”

Louis smiled though it didn’t quite reach his eyes as he closed them briefly and nodded. “I appreci-- _shit!_ ” Louis cried out when the all too familiar pain returned, the hand in Harry’s tightening almost painfully. “Oh, God…”

“Focus on me, Louis,” Harry directed, sitting up in the chair and watching Louis breathe through the contraction.

Louis did his best to meet Harry’s eyes, breathing heavily through his nose as tears threatened to spill. This contraction was worse than the last one and Louis swore it was longer, too. There was a sudden shift as he felt the baby drop further into the canal and he gasped.

“H-Harry, it’s coming now, I can feel the baby… it’s moving fast,” Louis cried, his legs dropping open as his body started pushing on its own accord. 

Louis half expected to see Harry panic but he didn’t. He rose from his chair and situated Louis’ legs into the stirrups and lifted his gown, eyes widening slightly at the fleshy mound forcing its way out.  
“Yeah, Louis, the baby’s crowning,” Harry announced, grabbing the call button above Louis’ head and thumbing the switch a few times. “You’re going to be okay, Louis, I promise.”

Could Harry sense Louis’ apprehension from this entire ordeal? He was about to deliver a living, breathing human and he was scared shitless. He didn’t even get the chance for an epidural because he was dilating too fast and now, nearly five hours later, his baby’s already crowning.

“I’m just scared,” He whimpered, crying out when the baby started moving rapidly. “I need to push!”

“Hold on, Louis, they’re coming, try not to push.”

Louis shook his head, panicking as his body pushed on its own, gripping the rails and doing his best not to scream. Tears trickled down his face as the burning intensified. “Harry, the baby’s coming NOW!”

“Okay,” Harry concluded, grabbing the rolling stool and settling himself between Louis’ legs. He grabbed a pair of gloves out of the box near the bed and hastily slipped them on. Was this man mental? Was he about to deliver Louis’ baby? _Fuck no, you’re not qualified!_ “Okay, Louis, bare down and push.”

Louis snapped his eyes shut and bore down, panting as he felt his child descend. This was fucking unreal, absolute torture. How the _fuck_ did people do this all the damned time? For someone was dilated four centimeters a couple hours ago, the baby seemed to make its way rather soon. 

“It fucking hurts,” Louis sobbed, his knuckles white from the deathgrip on the bars. He collapsed against the pillows in a huff and shook his head. “I can’t do this. It hurts and I’m tired.”

“Louis, you can’t stop. You’re almost there. The head’s almost out and if you stop now the baby will suffocate,” Harry scolded. 

The pregnant man shook his head in disbelief sobbing quietly as beads of sweat rolled down the sides of his face. Fuck this. Fuck it all. He was never giving birth again. The machine monitoring Louis’ contractions and the fetus started beeping irregularly signaling that something was terribly wrong and that fueled Louis to grab the undersides of his knees and bare down again, determined to bring this child into the world. He’d be damned if he had gone nine months fighting tooth and nail to keep the baby alive only to be at fault if it was stillborn.

“Christ, this unbearable,” Louis said through gritted teeth, gasping out when the head finally emerged. 

Another gasp sounded at the door, Harry whipping around to see a nurse hovering at the door momentarily before she rushed over to Harry, hastily yanking on gloves and grabbing the suction bulb. Harry allowed the nurse to take over, standing by Louis and using the sheet to wipe the sweat from his face. 

“You’ve done well to help Louis deliver,” the nurse praised as she cleaned off the baby’s face and dabbed around Louis’ entrance.

There was a sudden spike of pain before he felt the baby move again and his hand reached out for the bars again. “Just get ‘em out!” He screamed, pushing with what strength he had left, feeling his hole stretch wider to accommodate the shoulders. The baby slipped out of Louis in a rush that he cried out in surprise, collapsing against the bed in a heap, panting heavily. 

Louis closed his eyes, trying to slow his breathing as he listened for the telltale sign the baby was alive. It was too quiet and Louis was getting anxious until there was a wet cough followed by a loud wail and Louis smiled in relief.

“What is it?”

“Oh, Louis, it’s a boy, and he’s beautiful,” Harry croaked, startling Louis. Was Harry crying? He delivered a boy. A healthy baby boy based off his cries.

“Is he okay?”

“More than okay,” the nurse answered, toweling off the newborn. “Do you want to hold him?”

Louis’ eyes widened as he glanced over at the nurse holding the wailing newborn--his baby. No. It wasn’t his baby. He belonged to someone else but he’d never forgive himself if he didn’t get to see the child’s features.

“Please?”

The nurse placed the newborn in Louis’ arms, the infant simmering down almost instantly and Louis fell in love. How could he love something he met just moments ago and now he’d have to give him up. The baby was a spitting image of Louis and it brought tears to his eyes as he stroked the baby’s tiny cheek.

“He’s so tiny,” Louis whispered, completely in awe at the fact he brought this perfect being into the world.

“We’re going to weigh him and input all his information in the system before we notify his adoptive parents,” the nurse informed. “Whenever you’re ready I’ll take him from you.”

It was as if reality came crashing down so suddenly and exhaustion took over. Louis fought to keep his eyes open wanting to revel in what could have been another life before he’d never see his son again. He bounced the baby lightly watching the baby sleep soundly before glancing up at Harry who stared admiringly at Louis holding his son. 

“Can you let the adoptive parents know they have a son? I don’t really know who they are since you’ve been handling it.”

“Of course,” Harry answered, gently lifting the newborn out of Louis’ arms when he noticed the fatigue set in and his arms loosen. “I’ll take care of everything and you just get some rest, okay?”

And Louis did just that. He passed out almost instantly leaving Harry to handle everything dealing with his son and his new family. It was an emotional rollercoaster and there was so much Louis had to do legally before he could wash his hands with this part of his life and move on. The only issue was the fact he’d _eventually_ have to meet his son’s new parents and sign his rights away. The amount of courage and sacrifice to give up your child is something one could never understand. No matter the urge to keep him, the thought process behind the ordeal, Louis had made the right decision. Giving his son to a family with picket fences and a large backyard takes precedence over a rundown apartment in the shadiest part of New York.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry scooped his new son out of his little cot and cradled him to his chest, smiling when the baby gurgled and curled against him. Harry was definitely meant to be a father. It came almost natural to him and Louis couldn’t help but beam at the sight. A small part, and Louis means _small_ part of him wished he’d be part of that family but he was only Harry’s friend and he couldn’t be more than that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back with another chapter! :) I sort of loved this one and the baby's name is my ULTIMATE fav! Mehren (Mare-Ren) if anyone had issues pronouncing it! (Basically like Aaron with an 'M')
> 
> As always, kudos and comments are always welcome!! :)

When Louis came to, the hospital room was dark, the only light casting a shadow from the moon from the partially drawn curtains. At first Louis thought he was alone until he noticed an awkwardly huddled figure sleeping soundly in the pull-out chair next to his bed. Harry had stayed; risked a stiff neck and back just so Louis wouldn’t be alone and his heart swelled at that. Louis grabbed his phone off the table, clicking the home button and finding that it was nearly one in the morning. He’s not quite sure what time he delivered his son, but he did remember it was around mid morning. Had Louis really slept all day? Why didn’t anyone wake him up? Didn’t the baby need to eat? Louis figured since he was giving up the child that the hospital staff found other means of feeding the child.

Louis’ stomach growled from hunger and he rubbed his stomach trying to soothe the dull ache, a feeling of emptiness washing over him when he realized the child he had been carrying for nine months was no longer there. Despite the struggles of growing the baby and all the aches and pains that came with it, he missed being pregnant. There was a new sense of vulnerability now that he wasn’t pregnant; now that he was free from any burdens. It was as if he was fair game. And by fair game, Louis didn’t even know what that entailed.

Louis’ baby wasn’t in the room and the new parent figured they had taken him to the nursery. He worried his bottom lip wondering if it was a good idea to ask to hold his son again or cut all ties now. Granted, by law, Louis had a month to rescind his offer and keep the child but he’d never do that--he _couldn’t_ do that. No matter how much the nagging feeling in is gut begged and pleaded with him to keep his child, he couldn’t afford to raise a child. He could barely afford himself. He’d have to withdraw from Columbia, work double shifts; be the stereotypical single parent. Louis owed it to his son and himself to give him a better life. Even if that better life meant Louis wouldn’t be in it.

“Are you feeling better?” came Harry’s voice from his spot in the chair causing Louis to nearly jump out of his skin. How long had he been awake and if he _had_ been awake for sometime, was he staring at Louis getting lost in his thoughts the entire time?

“Yeah, somewhat,” I answered with a shrug. “Did you get some sleep?”  
Harry laughed, a warm sound that made Louis smile in return as he mimicked Louis’ shrug. “I dozed off maybe a couple hours ago?”

Louis nodded in acknowledgment. “Did you call the adoptive parents?”

Again, Harry’s face brightened with a wide smile and nodded. “They’re informed.”

“Oh, good. Did they get to meet their son?”

“They did and they’re beyond ecstatic that they’re parents.”

That settled some of Louis’ nerves. At least the family Harry chose approved of their son. What wanting parent _wouldn’t_ approve of their child, especially those that can’t have children of their own and had the option to adopt? “Good, I’m glad. I know I’ll have to meet them at some point to sign my rights away.”

Harry looked like he was bursting at the seams, as if he was harboring some massive secret that would be life-changing. “You’ve already met them.”

Louis raised a brow, staring at Harry as if he’d grown two heads. “The hell are you on about? What do you mean I’ve already met them?” Louis had interviewed two families around his second trimester but he didn’t deem them a good fit and he hadn’t known Harry then so he was certain none of those people were his son’s parents. “Who are they?”

Harry outstretched his hand, smile so large it looked almost painful. “Hi, Louis, I’m Harry Styles, and I’ll be adopting your son.”

Louis gaped, eyes wide in astonishment as he shook his head frantically. Surely, this was some joke, right? No way did Harry adopt Louis’ son. “Cut the shit. No, you’re not.” 

“God’s honest truth, Louis. I wouldn’t joke about something like this. I really adopted your son,” Harry assured, his smile faltering. 

This news shouldn’t have sparked Louis with rage but it did. “Why the fuck would you do that?” He exclaimed. 

“Louis, just hear me out, okay? I promise I have a good reason,” Harry spoke, hands up in defense and voice leveled in hopes it would simmer Louis’ mood.

“You damn well better!”

Harry pursed his lips and pulled the chair back up to Louis’ bed before sitting down. “I’ve always wanted to be a parent. From the time I was five years old I’d run around the house playing mom and stealing my sister’s babydolls. When I found out I was gay I figured, just like you, that I wouldn’t be able to father my own children and then when the hoopla about the uterine gene was released, I had some ounce of hope with the thought that maybe I had that gene too. I got tested and found out I wasn’t and my hops at having my own kids dwindled and then I met you in our English class and you were giving up your baby…”

Louis shook his head. The more Harry explained, the more selfish this response sounded. Louis understood the taller male’s wants for parenthood and the disappointment of not having the gene but the fact that he adopted Louis’ son after befriending him nearly four months ago had Louis thinking Harry befriended him for his personal benefit.

“So, you found a pregnant guy in your class and figured you could befriend him and gain his trust so he’d willingly give you his child?” Louis spat. “You fucking used me, didn’t you? Befriending me, buying me things, asking me if I wanted to keep my child, and for what, Harry? Was this your plan all along? To get me to give my child to you? Because you _knew_ I couldn’t afford them and you can? Fuck you!”

“No!” Harry gasped, eyes wide with alarm. “Louis, that’s the farthest from the truth, I swear! You could have been as rich as me and made the decision to give up your child and I still would have offered to adopt your son, Louis. Your living arrangements and your social class had nothing to do with my decision.”

Louis glared at Harry, scouring his features for any malice, any sign that adopting Louis’ child was for other reasons but the one he refused to believe. “You just can’t leave me alone, can you?”

“No, Louis, I can’t,” Harry answered, a small smile playing at his lips. Perhaps he was in the clear, but only momentarily. “I figured if I adopted your son, you could still be in his life without the financial burden. Ninety-five percent of biological parents who give up their children have regrets and I didn’t want you living your life with the regret that you were forced to give up your child.”

“But it’s not a regret, Harry,” Louis argued. “I was raped and I didn’t want to raise my rapist’s child!”

There it was. Out in the open. The lingering secret that Louis had fought tooth and nail to keep, especially from Harry who he was starting to develop feelings for. Harry fish-mouthed for a response upon hearing that information and Louis’ eyes welled with tears as he dropped his eyes from the other man’s and fiddled with his fingers. 

“I was terrified that he’d look like _him_ and I couldn’t live my life despising my child because his other father was a monster. B-but then he was born and he looks exactly like me and while I had an ounce of remorse I was giving him up, I knew it was best to give him away. Just please don’t ask me about the rape, okay? I’ve done what I could to bury that part of my life and I don’t want to dig it up again.”

“I won’t,” Harry said without question. 

“Thank you.” Louis sighed and closed his eyes before peering back at Harry. “By you adopting my son, you’re cleaning up my mess and I can’t let you do that.”

The longer Louis stared at Harry, the guiltier he felt. Who was he to deny this man a chance at fatherhood? This opportunity was presenting itself to Harry and Louis was the force preventing him and he couldn’t do that to him. Harry had done so much for Louis; for his baby. If anything, he was more than a perfect choice to father his child. He was financially stable, had a heart of gold and the only man Louis’ grown to trust.  
“I can understand where you’re coming from in that regard, but if it was a different family, would you think they’re cleaning up your mess, too?”

Realization dawned on Louis because Harry had a point. Regardless of who adopted his child, they were cleaning up Louis’ mess from allowing someone he didn’t trust into his pants and ending up pregnant. 

“You make a fair point, Harry,” Louis agreed. “I’ll let you adopt my son. I know you have the means to support him and you’ll give him the life he deserves.”

Harry pulled Louis into a hug before he had a chance to process the embrace and hesitantly wrapped his arms around the taller man. _Oh God, he smelled so good._ The warmth of his body felt amazing against Louis’ frail frame that he could stay in Harry’s arms forever.

“Thank you, Louis,” Harry mumbled into his shoulder. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

“You deserve him, Harry,” came Louis’ muffled reply.

“Would you like to hold him again?”

“You’d let me? E-Even though he’s no longer mine?”

“For one, he _is_ still yours. And two, we’re friends and friends hold each other’s kids all the time, yeah?”

“I guess?” Louis shrugged. “But, still. Won’t it be strange since I’m the one who delivered him?”

“He’s hours old, Louis,” Harry argued. “As he gets older, and if we’re still friends then, we’ll tell him the truth if you decide that you want him to know that you’re his biological father. Otherwise, he can know that I’m his father and you and I are just simply friends.”

“I’d prefer if he never knew who I was.”

“Then that’s how we’ll have it. We can discuss legalities later, yeah? All the paperwork isn’t due for a month anyway.”

“I can work with that,” Louis agreed.

Harry smiled, relieved and satisfied with their agreement. “So we’re okay now?”

“We’re okay.”

“Then do you want to hold him?” Harry asked anxiously and Louis couldn’t help but giggle at his eagerness. Harry was like a bloody kid on Christmas.

“Not right now,” he declined with a yawn, confirming his reasons. 

“Maybe later when he’s awake. I keep forgetting its the middle of the night.”

Louis yawned again, his eyes drooping as he pulled the blankets up his body. “We can talk more later, yeah?”

“Of course,” Harry chirped. “Goodnight, Louis.”

“Goodnight, Harry. Thanks for being here.”

Louis was content; finally felt at peace. He delivered his child who was happy and healthy, he was going to never want for anything and his new father was probably the most incredible man on the planet. Were pieces finally coming together? Yes. Louis thought so.

***

Harry scooped his new son out of his little cot and cradled him to his chest, smiling when the baby gurgled and curled against him. Harry was definitely meant to be a father. It came almost natural to him and Louis couldn’t help but beam at the sight. A small part, and Louis means _small_ part of him wished he’d be part of that family but he was only Harry’s friend and he couldn’t be more than that. 

“Do you want to hold him?”

“Okay,” Louis said without pretense and Harry was suddenly placing the tiny baby in Louis’ arms. “He’s so tiny.”

“Five pounds,” Harry remarked.

Guilt spread through Louis’ body like a virus and he found himself tearing up at the news. “He’s underweight. I tried to keep him healthy, I did!”

“No, hey, Louis, it’s alright,” Harry whispered, sitting on the edge of the hospital bed and placing a soothing hand over Louis’ arm. “He _is_ healthy. His lungs and heart are strong. The nurse said he’s a healthy eater, too. He’ll gain twice his weight within a week. Please don’t feel like you’ve failed him.”

Louis sighed in relief at Harry’s reassurance and glanced down at the sleeping newborn. Despite his size, his cheeks were pink and he seemed perfectly fine. He may be slightly underweight but Harry was right. Babies tended to gain twice their weight rather quickly and that knowledge was enough to calm his nerves.

“Thank God he’s healthy. Did you pick a name for him yet?”

Harry smiled and nodded, gazing down at the newborn. “His name is Mehren Everett Styles.”

Louis’ eyes sparkled with approval before they flashed with realization at the choice of his middle name. “I really like that.”

“I thought you’d approve. I’m a fan of unique names and the name together seems strong and different, just like him.”

“It’s perfect, Harry.” Louis caressed Mehren’s small cheek and the natural urge to coddle him and kiss his cheeks was strong. Louis handed Mehren back to Harry before the urge became too much and yawned. “Thank you, Harry, for everything.”

Mehren fussed with all the movements but Harry was quick to settle him. “You’re welcome, Louis. Thank _you_ for giving me a son.”

The tears that welled in Louis’ eyes weren’t of upset, but of joy. Despite the circumstances that led to Mehren’s birth, the outcome was positive and Louis felt as if he could finally breathe. The weight he’d been carrying on his shoulders for the last nine months had finally been lifted. Mehren was placed with a great family, Louis gained a new friend and he made Harry a father. 

Louis shrugged with a smile, fighting the urge to sleep again. “Consider it a thank you for all that you’ve done for me.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The nagging thought of Harry forgetting Louis or not wanting to associate himself with him anymore had him digging through his notebook looking for Harry’s address. He had written it down the day Louis was discharged, letting him know he was welcome to visit Mehren whenever he desired. Louis wondered if that offer still stood or if he regretted giving Louis his address.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here's another! :) Enjoy my lovelies! Xx

_2 Weeks Later_

Since Mehren’s birth, Louis had been in school a week and everything seemed to return to normal so quickly it felt strange. Louis returned to his natural, introverted self; inputting his opinion during lectures whenever he deemed appropriate, getting lost in his essays and finally returning to work. Harry had refused to let Louis work during the remainder of his pregnancy and in return had covered his rent until he was able to go back to work upon Louis’ request. Louis was grateful his manager was sweet enough to hold his position until he delivered because he needed all the money he could get.

Louis hadn’t seen nor heard from Harry since the day he went home and Louis figured the man had his hands full with a newborn. It shouldn’t have bothered Louis the way it did not hearing from Mr. Adonis. He thought they’d remain friends, fall into a comfortable pattern of dinners in his apartment or maybe a small outing but who was Louis kidding? He had done damage by being stubborn and maybe a little vicious toward Harry throughout his pregnancy due to his insecurities and distrust. Perhaps Harry finally realized Louis’ true personality and felt it was best to stand clear. Louis wouldn’t blame him. He’d stand clear, too. 

The nagging thought of Harry forgetting Louis or not wanting to associate himself with him anymore had him digging through his notebook looking for Harry’s address. He had written it down the day Louis was discharged, letting him know he was welcome to visit Mehren whenever he desired. Louis wondered if that offer still stood or if he regretted giving Louis his address.

So here he was, sitting outside the gates of a grandiose house, roughly the size of Disneyland maybe slightly smaller. Perhaps Louis was exaggerating but the house was large. It was more of a manor then anything. The iron gates had to be at least twenty feet tall with a large SM in the center. The home seemed intimidating as Louis walked up the gravel road to the intercom, zipping up his hoodie before pressing the call button.

“Styles Manor, how can I help you?” came a shrill voice from the speakers.  
“Uh, this is Louis Tomlinson here to see Harry Styles,” Louis spoke into the speaker, surveying his surroundings and finding a camera zooming in on his figure. No surprise there. Harry’s place looked like a fortress.

“One moment, sir.” There was a click and then silence. Louis tapped his foot idly as he anxiously waited for a response or the gates to open. “Return to your car and follow the winding road to the right. Mr. Styles will meet you out front.”

 _Wow, so lucrative,_ Louis thought as he thanked the speaker before returning to his car and followed the winding road. Just as Louis cut the engine and sat in his car, two grand doors slowly opened and Harry stepped out onto the porch and Louis gasped at his appearance.

What was usually a well kept, Mr. Sex-On-Legs was replaced with an exhausted young man with dark circles under emerald eyes and wrinkled clothes. His hair was pulled into a messy bun and despite the warm smile Harry shot Louis’ way it did nothing to mask his exhaustion. Christ, was Mehren a difficult baby?

“Louis?” Harry asked as Louis stepped out of the car and approached the tired man. “What are you doing here?”

“Came to see if you were still alive,” Louis snorted, trying to be humorous. In actuality, Louis was gauging Harry’s reaction to see if they were on solid or rocky ground.

“Of course I am,” he beamed and Louis mentally sighed in relief. If he was smiling, that was a good sign, right? Harry pulled Louis into a tight hug and Louis physically stiffened. He was getting better at the affection provided by Harry but physical contact was still a sensitive topic. Louis hesitantly returned the gesture and Harry seemed to welcome it, rubbing Louis’ back before he pulled away with an apologetic smile. “I just put Mehren down for a nap.”

He led Louis into his house and the younger man gaped at the interior. The inside did nothing to shield its size. If the exterior was massive, the inside was ten times larger. Harry was definitely well off and as he followed Harry through massive home, his decision in giving Mehren to Harry was proving better and better. 

“You weren’t in school this week and I was starting to worry,” Louis found himself saying, the words spilling out like vomit. He wasn’t supposed to let Harry know his concern for the taller male.

“I’m sorry,” Harry answered guiltily. “Since Mehren’s been home, I’ve lost track of time and days. I haven’t really been messaging you or checking up on you and I’m sorry.”

“I’m just your friend, Harry,” Louis answered with a shrug, brushing off his statement. “You’re a father now and Mehren comes first.”

“That’s beside the point,” Harry argued, leading Louis into a room at the end of the hall. 

Louis gaped at the room Harry brought him to. It was Mehren’s nursery and it was beautiful. Hues of blues, grays, and greens with white oak furnishings. Mehren’s nursery was practically the size of Louis’ apartment and he couldn’t help but feel jealous of the infant. This boy had it made and he’d definitely want for nothing being Harry’s son.

“The nursery is beautiful, Harry,” Louis whispered in awe as he walked further into the room and sat in the rocking chair.

“My mother’s idea. She designed it,” Harry answered as he walked over to an oval crib and gently scooped up a sleeping Mehren. 

Louis watched as Harry sat on the small white couch and placed Mehren on his chest, rubbing the baby’s tiny back and pressing little kisses to his forehead. Louis chewed on his lip, the real reason he was here prying at him to voice his opinion. If he didn’t ask the question and know the truth, it would eat the man alive.

“Hey, Harry?” Louis began, waiting until the taller man glanced up at him before he spoke again. “Are we still friends?”

Harry was taken off guard by Louis’ question and he sat up a little straighter on the couch and gazed at Louis with concerned expression. “Of course we are, Lou, why wouldn’t we be?”

Lou. That was the first time Harry had used the nickname and an influx of adoration washed over Louis. Maybe he had nothing to worry about and all this inner turmoil was for nothing. Then again, he hadn’t heard from Harry in two weeks since he was discharged.

“Because I hadn’t heard from you in two weeks. You went from visiting me almost every chance you had to not seeing me at all. You didn’t even so much as send me a text message so I was worried.”

Guilt washed over Harry’s face and he frowned. “It wasn’t intentional, Louis, I promise. I’ve just been so busy with Mehren, I’ve barely had a moment to breathe.”

Why was Louis so concerned about getting Harry’s attention. He just said Harry was only a friend so his want for attention was unnecessary. Of course Harry would be busy with the baby. Newborns took a lot of time and attention and Louis was a fool to think everything would remain the same after Mehren was born. 

“I guess I didn’t expect you to be my friend after Mehren was born,” Louis responded, dropping his gaze to his fingers and chewing his lip. “You wouldn’t have to worry about making sure I ate or was still alive since I wasn’t pregnant anymore.”

Harry rose from the couch and set Mehren back in his crib before tossing a few lone blankets and rags in the wicker basket. The lack of response from Harry was unnerving as Louis followed his movements. Was his assumptions correct? Was this the end of their friendship?

“Come with me,” Harry stated before exiting the nursery expecting Louis to follow. The smaller man was on his heels, shuffling down the hallway and falling in step with Harry before he rounded a corner and entered another room.

Judging by the hues of grays, reds, and whites and the large king sized bed centered in the room, it had to be Harry’s bedroom. The room seemed like any other young male’s room with posters pinned up on most of the walls, trophies from his childhood and pictures of his family. It was a stark contrast to all the mature aspects of the rest of the house. This room enhanced Harry’s personality and expressed just how young Harry truly was. Louis admired the large bookshelf installed on one wall with thousands of books tucked neatly on the shelves. The little window seat on the opposite wall with crimson pillows and matching curtains seemed to Harry’s favorite spot if the tattered book and pile of blankets were anything to go by. 

“Shit, your room is huge!” Louis gasped.

Harry smiled sheepishly and shrugged. “It’s just a room.”

Louis rolled his eyes and sat on the edge of his bed. _Just a room, my ass._ If Louis had a room like this he’d never leave his home. The room could have been his own little apartment. Louis swore he spotted a mini fridge in one of the corners, too.

Harry grabbed his rolling desk chair and pulled it up to the bed, sitting directly in front of Louis and crossing his arms over his chest. The shirt strained against the span of Harry’s chest and Louis bit his lip, quickly averting his eyes. Harry was too attractive for his own damn good.

As silence drug on, Louis grew more nervous. The last time he was brought into another man’s bedroom he was split open and left bleeding and for dead. Louis visibly cringed at the memory and Louis was certain Harry noticed the reaction, too.

“Why’d you bring me to your room, Harry?” Louis asked, wary of the situation. Harry would never hurt him and they were only friends but inviting someone into a bedroom could be mistaken as an intimate gesture.

“It’s time to have a heart to heart.”

“Hear to heart?” Louis asked, pursing his lips.

“Yes,” Harry answered, crossing his right leg over left and leaning forward. “You believe now that Mehren is born that I’m no longer interested in being you friend or that I’ve suddenly lost interest in you, period.”

Louis hung his head in shame and nodded. “Well, yeah. Now that Mehren is here and you’ve got a son, you wouldn’t want anything to do with me anymore. It’s just my own securities, I guess.”

Harry let out an exasperated sigh and Louis wondered if he should just get up and leave. Clearly he’s upset the man. The longer Louis sat on Harry’s bed while the other man stared into his soul, the more uncomfortable Louis began to feel and he was ready to book it. 

“You have never left my mind since the first day I saw you in class, Louis,” Harry confessed. “You’ve been dealt a heavy hand and I want nothing more than to help you, okay? You deserve to be happy; to live comfortably, Louis. What you’ve gone through--the sacrifices you’ve made--has made you the strongest man alive. At least in my eyes and no one could tell me differently.”

Was this his confession; the heart to heart Harry said they’d have? Hearing Harry’s affirmation viewed him a new light and Louis’ heart swelled. Louis found that it kept swelling with adoration for Harry and he wasn’t sure if he should plunge into these feelings or ignore them.

“You really think that about me?”

“Of course, I do,” Harry answered immediately, his smile sending a shrill of excitement through Louis. “I’ve just been extremely busy with Mehren and rearranging my priorities now that I’m a father. Every time I’d go to message you I was either interrupted by Mehren or someone else needing my attention and by the time I was free again I was exhausted. I haven’t gotten proper sleep since I brought Mehren home.”

Louis pursed his lips as he absorbed the information. Here Louis was being selfish and insecure when Harry’s lack of communication was due to valid reasons. He felt horrible for jumping the gun and he wanted to curl in on himself. “I’m sorry if I misinterpreted everything. I probably came off as some psychotic and demanding boyfriend.”

“You didn’t,” Harry assured with a wry laugh. “Though the boyfriend aspect sounds appealing.” Louis nearly choked on air at Harry’s response. Boyfriend? Be Harry’s boyfriend? No, Harry had _so_ many options. Louis couldn’t be that.

Louis’ cheeks flushed and he smiled in return. “Well, you’re my only friend. I don’t really talk to anyone.”

“You talk to me.”

“You were the only one who didn’t think of me as a slut.”

“No one should give you that label,” Harry declared. “They don’t know your life so they have no right to judge.”

“Are you always this perfect?” Louis asked with a wry laugh.

Harry scoffed. “I’m nowhere near perfect.”

 _But you are. Everything about you is perfect._ From his curly locks to striking emerald eyes to the lanky figure that he’d clad in designer clothes. He was downright beautiful and his personality complimented his physical attributes. Louis could go on for days and not find a single imperfection. He was this flawless being and the fact that Harry denied his perfection and the humbleness about his wealth only added fuel to that fire.

“I’m not used to having friends so you can understand where my uncertainty is coming from, right?”

“I do and you don’t need to worry,” Harry assured. “I will always be your friend, Louis.” The way Harry said those words made Louis smile and definitely put all his qualms to rest. 

“Okay.”

“So, how about a movie?” Harry asked changing the subject as he reached for his remote.

“Sure,” Louis answered with a sheepish smile.

Harry climbed into his bed and sat against the headboard as he flicked through the movie menu on his television. Louis hesitated before toeing off his shoes and sitting next to the taller male. “You know, you should smile more often, your eyes brighten when you do.”

Louis flushed and spluttered for a response. “Uh…”

Harry laughed at Louis’ awkwardness and shook his head. “Right, so let’s find a movie!”


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis sighed and scrubbed his hands down his face and pulled his knees into his chest as he peered up at Harry over them. “I was at a party,” Louis began and Harry’s eyes widened upon realization.
> 
> “Louis, you don’t have to tell me--
> 
> \--no, Harry, I need to. I _want_ to. You deserve an explanation, so let me finish.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, my lovelies! I'm back with another chapter! Louis explains what happens to him in this chapter and it's not really graphic, just a summarized rape, so if any of you are triggered, just skip a few paragraphs! 
> 
> I'm debating whether or not to make the next chapter an addition or the epilogue! Let me know! :)
> 
> As always, kudos and comments are always welcome :D

Louis startled awake and realized he was warm--too warm. He was cocooned in someone’s arms and Louis momentarily panicked before he remembered his whereabouts and visibly relaxed. He must have dozed off against Harry and somehow found his way into his arms. An arm subconsciously tightened around Louis’ waist and he tensed again.

“Louis?” Harry asked warily, gauging the younger male’s reaction.

“What happened?” Louis asked, untangling himself from Harry’s body and sitting up disheveled. 

“We were watching a movie and you fell asleep.”

“Your arm was around my waist,” Louis hissed and he shouldn’t have been this upset but Harry _knew_ Louis’ limits and boundaries and he should have never took it upon himself to cuddle him. 

Harry distanced himself from Louis, hands up in a defensive gesture. “I’m sorry, Louis, you had fallen asleep on me so I assumed it was okay to hold you while you slept. I wasn’t going to try anything.”

Louis stared wide eyed and frantic at the other man, finding nothing but apologetic features and concern etched in his face. “Alright, I believe you. I’m sorry. I overreacted and I didn’t--

\--you don’t need to explain,” Harry interrupted, holding up his hand. “It was my mistake for assuming.”

“But that’s just it,” Louis hissed, angry at himself for getting so worked up for an innocent embrace. “You shouldn’t have to walk on eggshells around me. God, why can’t I just be normal?”

“Louis, you were raped. It was a traumatic experience,” Harry explained, sitting cross-legged in front of Louis. “These reactions are all normal so I understand.”

Harry shouldn’t _have_ to understand; shouldn’t have to tread carefully around him. He was his friend and he’s proven to be just that and nothing short of it. Perhaps if Harry knew what happened it would shed a new light.

Louis sighed and scrubbed his hands down his face and pulled his knees into his chest as he peered up at Harry over them. “I was at a party,” Louis began and Harry’s eyes widened upon realization.

“Louis, you don’t have to tell me--

\--no, Harry, I need to. I _want_ to. You deserve an explanation, so let me finish.” Harry nodded and pursed his lips urging Louis to continue. Louis hadn’t spoken about his rape since the trial and the thoughts and memories he pushed aside came flooding through like a broken dam. Here goes nothing. 

“It was around finals of my sophomore year in college. I was swamped and stressed and I just needed a break. The guy who raped me, his name was Declan. He was in my chemistry class and offered to tutor me since I hadn’t been doing too well since the start and with the desperate need for friends I all too anxiously agreed.” Louis stared at Harry as he told his story, eyes occasionally drifting to his own knees or some object on the wall. Louis let out a shaky breath before he continued.

“Declan was so kind and sweet at first. He’d pick me up from my apartment and take me to his place to study and drive me back after a few hours. It was a comfortable routine for a couple of weeks and after my first B on my chemistry exam, I had asked Declan to continue to tutor me for the rest of the semester. Eventually, Declan and I got close and we kissed a few times during our lessons which is probably why I was so easily convinced and eager to attend a Frat party with him.”

Louis could sense the tension in the room had risen and briefly wondered if he should stop. When Harry urged him to continue, giving the shorter male a reassuring smile, Louis proceeded.

“I was such an awkward kid, you know. I arrived with Declan but I mainly hovered by a corner and Declan seemed to notice because he shoved a red cup in my hands and told me to loosen up. I had downed it without a second thought. I had trusted him, after all. Everything seemed fine for awhile but then I started feeling funny. The drink must have been laced with something because my vision started to blur and I couldn’t walk straight and everything seemed so far away. When Declan led me to an empty bedroom, I knew something was off and I had a bad feeling but I couldn’t shake it.” Harry stiffened and swallowed hard as Louis approached the climax of his story and perhaps Louis was making Harry uncomfortable. “Should I stop?”

“No, it’s okay. Continue.”

“It’s all a blur from there, really,” Louis answered with a shrug. “I remember Declan on top of me, his alcoholic breath in my face and him telling me I had such a tight ass. I didn’t realize what was happening until he was already inside me. I just remember screaming and begging him to stop because I was in so much pain and all he did was laugh.” Tears brimmed in Louis’ eyes at the memory and he let out a shaky breath.

Harry hesitated briefly before placing a comforting hand to Louis’ knee. “We can stop.”

“No,” Louis declined, shaking his head rapidly. “You need to know.” Harry reluctantly nodded, returning his hand to his own lap.

“Others were in the room because I was held down. That much I remember. I think Declan’s friend Robert wanted a turn but Declan had made a comment that “my ass belonged to him” and then I must have blacked out since I don’t remember anything else.” The tears were free flowing by then and Louis frantically wiped them away. “Some girl found me a few hours later and called the police. And the rest is history.”

The humiliation Louis went through that night was difficult to retell and now he was sobbing like a bitch in front of a man he was falling for. Fuck, he was so pathetic. Harry seemed to notice Louis at war with himself because he was suddenly invading the shorter male’s space, grabbing Louis’ face gently between his large hands and forced glassy blue eyes to meet his concerned green ones. 

“Louis, listen to me, okay?” Harry began. “Declan was an asshole for taking advantage of you. He had no right to destroy what you had spent months on building. You’re an incredible person inside and out, okay? You’re so brave for telling me all this, so thank you. It means a lot that you’ve trusted me enough to share your most intimate details.”

Louis gazed into Harry’s emerald eyes, his hands coming up to cling onto Harry’s resting on his cheeks. This was it. All or nothing, right? Louis would either make or break their friendship with his next move. Pushing every doubt--every fear, and every negative notion aside, Louis leaned forward and pressed his lips against Harry’s.

Harry didn’t react immediately, just stared wide-eyed as if Louis didn’t have his lips pressed against his own. Harry’s unmoving figure gave off the wrong impression and Louis was ready to pull away, splutter out a string of apologies and bolt but Harry’s hands had dropped from Louis’ face in favor of grabbing his hips and pulling him into his lap. Harry’s smashed his lips against Louis’ in a fevered kiss, pulling a startled moan from the shorter male as he curled his arms around Louis’ lithe frame.

**Harry’s POV**

To have Louis initiate any type of physical contact took Harry by surprise but nonetheless, he welcomed anything Louis would give him. He knew that if he didn’t reciprocate quickly, Louis would take his reaction the wrong way and most likely over-analyze the entire situation. 

Harry was an affectionate person. He believed in showering the people he loved with hugs and kisses, especially with his significant other. When he met Louis, Harry had to adjust his demeanor and refrain from the constant displays of affection. Harry hadn’t the slightest clue what Louis went through before tonight but he figured it was something traumatic if the continuous flinching and tensing around Harry was anything to go by. But now, with Louis initiating such an intimate gesture, Harry felt that Louis had finally overcome a hurdle and realized Harry’s true intentions.

Harry would wait months for Louis, years even. Louis deserved to be happy-- to be shown that he deserves to be loved; that he’s not broken or damaged. He deserved that much. Harry knew the man had trust issues and struggled throughout life. This guy was so destroyed from what Declan did to him that it made his blood boil and gave Harry the uncontrollable urge to hunt Declan down and beat him to a bloody pulp. Perhaps if Harry and Louis took their relationship slow, he could prove to Louis that not every man was a monster like Declan--that Louis could live a decent life and be _happy._ He could be Louis’ new light.

“Lou…” Harry breathed, breaking the kiss after a moment to peer into cerulean eyes.

“Was that okay?” Louis asked in a whisper, fingers itching to pull Harry’s hands away and run for the hills.

“Yes, _God,_ yes, Louis. It was more than okay. Are _you_ okay?”

“I am,” Louis murmured with a blush, diverting his eyes elsewhere. “I...um, I guess it was a long time overdue.”

Harry laughed softly and stroked Louis’ cheek. “After all this time--all this uncertainty, why finally kiss me now?”

“Well, you’ve literally been my rock since you’ve met me and have proved to me time and time again that you’d never hurt me. On top of that, you adopted my son so he’d have a better life not to mention everything you did for me to make sure Mehren saw the light of day. So, it must mean you...love me.”

Harry’s eyes softened at Louis’ small affirmation and nodded, pressing his lips to Louis’ before pulling away to rest his forehead against Louis’. “I do, Louis. Love you, that is. And Mehren too, from the very beginning,” Harry professed.

One of Louis’ hands came up to curl around Harry’s neck and brought his mouth to Harry’s again and the taller male hummed in approval, allowing Louis to control the pace, not wanting to upset or startle him if he took control. Louis had become more confident in the few minutes they shared a kiss, pressing his body against Harry’s and urging Harry to kiss him more. Harry was a bit weary but let it happen, moaning when Louis’ tongue licked against his bottom lip hesitantly, as if asking for permission. Harry opened his mouth briefly, allowing Louis’ tongue to slide against his. Harry was ready to place Louis on his back and ask if he wanted to go further when their bubble was suddenly breached.

Mehren’s cries rang through the baby monitor on the nightstand and Harry pulled away with a breathless chuckle when Louis groaned in annoyance. “Parenthood at its finest.”

“Go take care of your son, I’m not going anywhere,” Louis smiled, relaxing against the mountain of pillows willing his startled erection to go down.

Harry climbed out of the bed though not before kissing Louis once more. “You promise?”

“I promise.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, my loves!!
> 
> I have returned with the final chapter of Introvert! I intend to have an epilogue for this story but I'm not sure when that will be published! Life is kicking my ass so bear with me. 
> 
> As always, thank you to everyone who leaves kudos and comments! You guys keep me going and inspire me to continue my passion for writing. For those that have read Psychotic Love and Reminiscent, I have not forgotten about you! I fully intend to get those completed too! One story at a time, right? Alright, enough of my rambling! GO READ! :D
> 
> *SMUT WARNING* - It's a brief scene but there is smut in it. It was well needed and overdue for these two, I believe, and I hope it meets everyone's standards. I am a bit rusty with smut scenes so don't fight me -.-

It’s been five months since Louis made the bold move to kiss Harry and it was the best decision he had made in his entire life.

Harry’s been his boyfriend for the last five months--and what a wonderful five months it had been. Of course, Harry’s been his overbearing self per usual but Louis’ welcomed it wholeheartedly. A month into their relationship, Harry had nagged Louis to move out of junkie-infested apartment and after an hour of arguing, Louis had reluctantly accepted. Louis didn’t realize that Harry’s offer meant moving him into an overly expensive apartment in the heart of New York City.

So here he was, lounging on his new leather sectional watching Netflix on his new 60 inch flat screen while he waited eagerly for Harry and Mehren to come over. Louis refused to admit it aloud, but he had developed a soft spot for the five month old infant and it was safe to say that Mehren felt the same.

With Louis entering his next semester of Criminal Psychology it proved more and more that becoming a criminal psychologist was his calling. Perhaps it could be the traumatic experience he endured nearly a year ago and the urge to serve justice to those that deserved it.

The sound of a key fumbling in the lock made Louis perk up, face splitting into a cheek-splitting grin as Harry entered the apartment with Mehren on his right hip and left hand full of groceries. Louis paused the movie and hopped off the couch to retrieve the bags from Harry.

“Why didn’t you tell me you went shopping? I could have gone with you,” Louis admonished.

“It was a spur of the moment decision on the way here, Lou,” Harry rebuked. “Plus, Mehren slept during most of the shopping so it was easy.”

Louis set the bags on his marble countertop, taking the items out of the bags and placing them in their designated spots. Harry set up Mehren’s playmat in the center of the living room floor before placing the infant on his tummy. He handed his son one of his toys who grabbed it in his little fist and gnawed on it. Harry chuckled and kissed Mehren’s forehead before he joined Louis back in the kitchen, wrapping his arms around Louis’ middle from behind and planting a sucking kiss to his neck.

“I missed you,” Harry hummed.

Louis paused at putting a few cans of food on the top shelf and closed his eyes, revelling in the warmth of Harry’s torso pressed against his back and the soft lips against his neck. Harry’s hands suddenly moved lower, just inches from Louis’ crotch and the younger male visibly tensed.

Louis knew Harry wanted to have sex with him but each time they tried to do anything remotely sexual, Louis would panic and work himself up into a proper fit.

The first time Louis had a panic attack, it took Harry nearly three hours to calm him down with the constant reassurance that the older male would never force Louis into anything he didn’t want to do or wasn’t comfortable with. Louis had felt like proper shit whenever each time he became antsy whenever Harry wanted a simple cuddle. It was Louis’ fucked up mind that would mistaken his boyfriend’s innocent embraces for something more.

For awhile, Harry kept his distance, only touching Louis with a quick kiss or hug whenever Louis initiated it. Of course, the lack of affection had sparked the couple’s first argument resulting in Louis storming out of Harry’s manor one evening in tears and ignoring the taller male for an entire week. It wasn’t until Harry showed up with a four foot stuffed bear and a dozen white roses pleading with Louis to take him back. Louis had no choice but to apologize to the huge sap he called his boyfriend. They discussed Louis’ barriers and limits over a romantic dinner that night and since then, their relationship seemed to flow smoothly.

Now, nearly three months later, Louis was just getting used to Harry’s random displays of affection and Louis feared if he didn’t give himself to Harry soon, the taller male would tire of him and find someone else less...complicated.

“Harry…”

Harry’s hands immediately dropped from Louis’ middle and took a step back. “Sorry, Sorry, I know…”

“No,” Louis quickly said, grabbing Harry’s hands and turning in his hold so he was peering up at the taller male. “This isn’t fair to you.”

Harry smiled fondly and stroked Louis’ cheek. “Oh, Lou. I know what you went through and it’s not something that you can heal from over night. I’m completely fine with taking this slow.”

Louis sighed, subconsciously nuzzling into Harry’s touch. “I don’t deserve you.”

“Don’t say that. You deserve the world.”

“Then why am I so fucked up?” Louis exclaimed, glaring at a loose thread on Harry’s shirt.

“You’re not fucked up,” Harry hissed. “ _He_ is fucked up for what he did to you! You’re recovering and you’re doing an _amazing_ job at it. Sex with you isn’t going to make or break our relationship, Louis. We’ll take as long as you need to until you’re ready for the next step.”

“But I _am_ ready,” Louis huffed. “I just don’t know what I’m afraid of.”

“You’re afraid that I might turn into him.”

Louis gasped, eyes snapping up to Harry’s in astonishment. It was as if Harry had broken the case--finally put together the missing piece to the puzzle that constructed Louis’ inner-turmoil.

“What? No! You’d never be like him.”

“I know, baby, but your mind still has that underlying fear,” Harry explained.

Harry had a valid point. Louis was ready to move their relationship to a sexual level _physically,_ but mentally he was terrified that in the midst of their copulating, Harry could somehow turn into Declan. It’s an absurd thought to have on account that Harry’s been nothing but perfection to Louis. But of course, Louis’ inner demons refuse to be put to rest.

“I won’t know until I try,” Louis whispered.

Harry’s eyes widened, almost in disbelief before he pursed his lips. “What are you saying?”

“I’m saying I want you to make love to me,” Louis professed, his hands wrapping around Harry’s middle and burying his face against Harry’s chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart.

“We can’t exactly leave Mehren unattended.”

Louis laughed wryly. “I’m not saying right this very moment, Haz. Maybe tonight or tomorrow even.”

“My mum would love some one on one time with her grandson. I’ll see if she’ll keep him for the weekend.”

“I don’t want to make you choose between me or your son.”

Harry laughed and kissed the top of Louis’ head. “That has nothing to do with me asking my mom if she wants to watch Mehren, Louis.”

“I’m being difficult, I know, I’m sorry,” Louis apologized with a frustrated sigh.

“You’re not being difficult, you’re overthinking.”

Louis chewed on his bottom lip as he pulled away from Harry’s chest to gaze up at him, arms still wrapped around his middle. “I’m just afraid that you’ll leave me one day because I’m not good enough.”

Harry cupped Louis’ cheeks between both hands and pressed a chaste kiss to Louis’ forehead. “You will _always_ be good enough for me--good enough for Mehren.”

Louis gave Harry a look because he knew what his boyfriend was hinting at. “Harry, we’ve been through this already.”  
“I know, but--

\--but nothing,” Louis snapped lightly. “My answer is still the same.”

Louis didn’t mean to snap, honestly. It’s just the fact that he had already gone through one hurdle relinquishing his parental rights when Harry adopted Mehren and though he didn’t know at the time that a relationship would transpire from Harry’s generosity and benevolent behavior , he never intended to be Mehren’s parent. Being someone’s father just wasn’t in the cards for Louis. His future career had no time for children. To Louis, it was as if he went one step forward only to take two steps back when Harry approached the idea of Louis unrelinquishing his rights so he could be Mehren’s second parent.

Harry sighed and rolled his eyes playfully, though Louis knew it bothered him. Harry rubbed Louis’ sides before rounding the counter. “You know I’m gonna keep asking but I’ll drop it for now. It’s Mehren’s feeding time anyway.”

And just like that, Harry and Louis fell into comfortable territory again as Harry grabbed a bottle and the little container of formula out of Mehren’s diaper bag. Louis leaned against the counter as he watched Harry mix the bottle before scooping Mehren into his arms and putting the nipple to his mouth. Harry sat on the couch, smiling down at Mehren when he grabbed the sides of the bottle of fed eagerly. 

Louis smiled to himself and admired the sight before him. Maybe being a parent with Harry wouldn’t be so bad. “You’re a natural, Haz.”

Harry glanced over to Louis and had the nerve to look embarrassed. “So are you.”

Louis tried to hide his own blush as he shook his head. “No, I’m not. How would you even know?”

“The way you interacted with Mehren when you first held him,” Harry answered, smiling down at his son, watching the baby’s eyes fall heavy. He waited until Mehren stopped suckling before he pulled the bottle from his mouth and placed the sleeping infant to his shoulder. “You just don’t like to admit it, Lou, but you’re really great with children.”

Louis scoffed. “I _birthed_ a child. Of course I’m good with children, it’s an automatic trait.”

Harry patted Mehren’s back, listening for a small burp as he quirked a brow at his boyfriend. “It’s not automatic. Regardless if you birthed a child or not, you have a knack for parenthood. Don’t be daft.”

“I’m not being daft, I’m speaking the truth!”

Harry chuckled and rolled his eyes, setting Mehren on one of the couch cushions and creating a makeshift crib with the pillows. He pressed a kiss to his son’s cheek before standing up.

Louis followed Harry’s movements, going nearly cross-eyed when his boyfriend crowded into his space, curling his arms around Louis’ hips and pecking his lips.

“What are you so afraid of?”

Louis couldn’t help but explore Harry’s beautiful features before he eventually averted his gaze. What was he supposed to tell Harry? That he constantly imagined having his baby--that domestic life sounded incredible and that he was afraid that his family would accuse Louis of being some gold-digging whore? Harry hadn’t introduced Louis to his mother yet though Louis had an inkling that she was a sweet woman and would welcome him with open arms. Regardless of the fact, it would be a different ballgame carrying Harry’s child versus Harry adopting.

“Commitment,” Louis answered with a sigh.

“Lous, I’m not telling you to marry me and bear my children,” Harry laughed in hopes to lighten the mood. “We’re only dating and we’re taking it slow.”

Louis worried his lip as he stared at his sock clad feet. He was afraid to meet Harry’s gaze in fear of seeing a loathing expression. “What if that’s not enough? What if you want more and I can’t give that to you because my fucked up mind won’t let it?”

There was a brief moment of silence before Louis felt Harry’s hand grip his chin and force him to meet his gaze. “What’s it going to take for you to see that you’re what I want and need? I’d wait an eternity for you, Louis.”

Those may have not been the words Louis had longed to hear but they were enough to have his eyes mist over as he wrapped his arms around Harry’s neck and brought him down into a searing kiss. Harry immediately reciprocated, pressing his lips firmer against Louis’ with renowned fervor, trying to coax his tongue into Louis’ mouth. The younger male moaned as he granted Harry access, finally surrendering himself to Harry. 

“H-Haz…”

“Tell me want you want,” Harry whispered.

“You. I want you...inside me,” Louis pleaded. “Please.”

Louis didn’t know where this newfound confidence came from. Perhaps it was Harry’s way of making Louis feel cherished and loved even if he hadn’t voiced those three words. He had taken care of Louis from the moment they met and continued well after Mehren was born. Louis wanted to express his appreciation and adoration for Harry and the only way Louis knew how was to give himself to the taller man.

Harry tensed for a moment, clearly not expecting those words to leave his boyfriend’s lips before he hoisted Louis onto the countertop and smashed their lips together, pulling a guttural moan from Louis. His eyes rolled back when Harry’s hand delved beneath the waistband of his sweatpants and wrapped around his growing erection.

“Oh, fuck,” Louis whimpered, grip tightening around Harry’s upper arms. “Harry…”

“Love how hot you get for me, Lou,” Harry whispered, pumping Louis faster. Louis’ moans only grew louder before he remembered Mehren was napping a few feet away from them and bit his lip to muffle his sounds. 

“We can’t wake Mehren,” Louis whispered, sinking his teeth into Harry’s shoulder when the man swiped his thumb over Louis’ slit. “Sh-Shit!”

“Let’s take this to the bedroom, yeah?” Harry offered, hoisting Louis into his arms and urging him to wrap his legs around Harry’s hips.

“But Mehren…” Louis trailed off. _Jesus, you’re about to get fucked and you’re worried about the baby?_

“He’s napping. He won’t be up for at least a couple hours.”

“Okay,” Louis relented and smiled when Harry grinned in return and whisked the two to Louis’ bedroom. Harry deposited Louis onto the mattress and crawled his way over to Louis, settling himself on top of the younger male. Louis cupped Harry’s face and brought him down into a forceful kiss. “Touch me. Please.”

Harry happily obliged, shoving his hand down Louis’ pants again and stroked him. “Gonna make you feel so good, love.”

“Please,” Louis begged. He wasn’t sure if he was going to last much longer. He hadn’t been touched like this since the beginning of college before Declan and Harry’s skilled hand was working him up too soon. 

Harry was quick to rid them both of their clothes before Harry disappeared into the bathroom to retrieve the bottle of lube and a condom. Louis’ body trembled with desire as he watched his boyfriend knee his way between Louis’ legs and uncapped the bottle, drizzling the liquid onto two of his fingers. Louis couldn’t help but spread his legs wider, silently hoping Harry would get the message to get on with it.

Louis’ body went rigid when Harry’s finger breached him, lips parting in a silent gasp. Harry was prepared to withdraw his finger but Louis quickly grabbed his wrist and shook his head. “It’s okay. Keep going.”

Harry nodded and pushed his finger in deeper, thrusting the digit in and out for a moment before adding a second. Harry watched Louis closely, gauging his reaction each time he scissored or crooked his fingers.

Louis couldn’t help but have a sudden influx of adoration for Harry for how gentle he was being, constantly asking him if he was alright, if he wanted to stop, or wanted more. Harry suddenly crooked his fingers over a bundle of nerves and Louis cried out, body arching. 

“Oh, God!” 

“There?” Harry smirked, rubbing his fingers over that spot again and watching as Louis gasped and fisted the sheets.

“Y-Yes, right there.” Harry continued his onslaught for a few minutes more, Louis’ cock leaking precome and heavy against his chest before he grabbed Harry’s wrist to stop his movements. “Enough. I’ll come if you keep going. M’ready.”

Louis felt a sense of emptiness when Harry removed his fingers and wiped them on the duvet. If Harry fucked even half as good as he fingered, Louis was in trouble.

Harry pecked Louis’ lips before he grabbed the foil wrapper, tearing open the package and rolling the latex over his length. “You’re so beautiful.”

Louis flushed and shook his head. “ _You’re_ the beautiful one.”

Harry rolled his eyes and grabbed the lube again, slicking up his cock before he positioned it outside Louis’ entrance. He adjusted Louis’ legs over his shoulders and leaned forward, the tip of his cock brushing Louis’ hole. “Ready?”

 _As I’ll ever be._ Louis swallowed the nerves and tried to steady his trembling as he nodded, urging Harry to continue with a light squeeze to his hip. Louis was acting like a bloody virgin and it was slightly embarrassing. Could Louis really blame himself though? His boyfriend’s cock was absolutely _massive_ and he wasn’t quite sure that it’d fit. Then again, he pushed out a child so maybe he was being a bit melodramatic.  
Harry smiled warmly and pushed forward. There was a bit of resistance but Louis eventually opened up for Harry as his cock pushed past the tight ring of muscle and sinked in slowly.

“ _Shit,_ ” Louis moaned, tossing his head back at the feeling of being filled. His body trembled and his walls clenched around Harry earning a strangled gasp from the taller male. Louis opened his eyes, finding his boyfriend’s face screwed up in pleasure and Louis couldn’t help but feel somewhat smug that he put that expression on Harry’s face.

“You okay?” Harry panted, fighting the urge to hold still. His hands idly caressed Louis’ sides--anything to distract him from the tight heat consuming his length.

“Y-Yes, just _move,_ ” Louis demanded, clenching tighter around Harry as he squirmed.

Harry bit back a moan and buried his face in Louis’ neck, sucking a mark in the divot of his shoulder as he pulled out and shoved back in deep. Louis cried out, arching his back from the overwhelming pleasure, hands flying to grip anything for purchase. Louis never experienced anything as intense as this before. The only other time he had sex--if being raped counted--was involuntary and a proper nightmare and it was more of a traumatic experience than the lust-filled and overwhelming pleasure he was currently experiencing.

Louis should have known Harry was a selfless lover in bed. With Harry focusing solely on Louis’ pleasure, angling his hips certain ways so each drag of Harry’s cock brushed against his sensitive walls, it was a given that the older male was everything but selfish. That fact, mixed with the unrelenting pressure against his prostate with each inward thrust had Louis on the precipice of orgasm rather quickly.

“Oh, God, Haz, I’m close. So fucking close,” Louis cried out.

Harry grabbed Louis’ cock, stroking him in tandem with his thrusts, desperately trying to get his boyfriend off. One swipe of Harry’s thumb over Louis’ slit had the younger male seizing up and crying out Harry’s name as he spilled over Harry’s hand and his own belly, clenching around Harry’s cock like a vice.

“Oh, shit, _Louis,_ ” Harry cried, following suit as he orgasmed, filling the condom and riding out their wave of pleasure. 

“That was incredible,” Louis panted, laughing breathlessly as he slowly came down from his high. If sex with Harry would be this intense each time, he was fucked...literally.

Louis winced when Harry pulled out and removed the condom. He tied off the end and tossed it into the bin before joining Louis back in bed. “No need to feed my ego, Lou.”

“I’m not,” Louis argued, pouting at his boyfriend as he curled up against him. “It’s the truth. It felt amazing.”

“Just wanted to make it great for you, Lou,” Harry murmured, pressing a kiss to Louis’ temple as he idly rubbed his back. “You’ve been through so much and I’m not trying to make you remember the bad but--

Louis silenced Harry’s rambling with a tender kiss, reveling in the post-coital bliss before he pulled away with a smile. “I love you, too, Haz.”

It was a big step to say those three words. He wasn’t sure if the sentiment was mutual but it was worth the risk. Call it post-coital confidence. Irregardless, he truly did love Harry. After all Louis has gone through and sacrificed and Harry’s overly kind heart and generosity, he could not help but feel grateful for Harry entering his life. Louis couldn’t pinpoint when these feelings of true love first manifested themselves--perhaps it was the moment when Harry told him he was adopting Mehren or even earlier when he vowed to help Louis throughout his pregnancy--but what Louis _was_ certain of was that Harry had saved his life. This man showed Louis what true happiness was. Harry Styles was perfect and special and everything in between. Louis would be damned if he let this curly-haired, dimpled-cheek, corny sap of a man go anytime soon.

Harry’s eyes widened at Louis’ affirmation and a smile split his face as he nodded. “Yes, Louis. I do love you.”


	13. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the four years since Louis’ met Harry, a lot has changed. For one thing, being engaged to Harry was something Louis never expected to happen. He assumed that Harry would have eventually grown tired of Louis’ self-destructive tendencies and find someone less complicated. But here he is, engaged to the love of his life and trying to adapt to the life of luxury that Harry’s provided for him.

*4 years later*

Mehren bounced happily in his booster seat as he munched on his little Goldfish snacks, bright blue eyes staring at the scenery whipping by. “Daddy, look! A sur-ell!”

Louis glanced in the rearview mirror and smiled at the bubbly boy smashing his little finger against the window. “You saw a squirrel, bud?”

“Uh huh!” Mehren exclaimed. “He gone now.”

“I’m sure we’ll see more at the park, yeah?” Mehren nodded, content with Louis’ answer and continued to eat his snack, attention back on the scenery passing by.

In the four years since Louis’ met Harry, a lot has changed. For one thing, being engaged to Harry was something Louis never expected to happen. He assumed that Harry would have eventually grown tired of Louis’ self-destructive tendencies and find someone less complicated. But here he is, engaged to the love of his life and trying to adapt to the life of luxury that Harry’s provided for him.

Of course, Louis didn’t nor want Harry to provide for him. He wanted to be equal in their relationship and contribute as much as possible but how could he when his fiance was extremely wealthy and had everything at his disposal? Leave it to Harry to be his sappy self and quell Louis’ worries by asking Louis to just love him forever. He truly didn’t deserve this man. For the most part, Louis’ been content working as an intern for one of the most well-known law firms in New York while he continued his schooling toward his Master’s in criminal psychology. If it weren’t for his future mother-in-law and the strings she pulled, Louis wouldn’t have ever gotten the opportunity to work with one of the best criminal psychologists in New York City. Louis feels that he has to up his game in the field since his fiance has majored in the same field.

Two years ago, on their anniversary, Louis had spoken to his personal attorney regarding Mehren’s adoption and had a legal document drawn up so Louis could surprise Harry with the news that he wanted to legally be Mehren’s parent. That was the first time Louis had actually seen Harry cry and he knew he made the right decision then. It had been a long time coming, really. Louis had watched Mehren learn to crawl, walk, and eventually talk. It wouldn’t make sense for Louis to remain in Harry and Mehren’s lives and not adopt the boy. After all, Louis _did_ give birth to him.

Adopting Mehren was the best decision Louis’ made next to saying yes to marrying Harry. Had the circumstances been different or a little better when Louis was pregnant with Mehren, he’s not certain he would have had the opportunity of meeting Harry and being as happy as he is now. Four years ago, when Harry first approached the subject of Louis adopting Mehren, Louis will admit he was just too stubborn to admit he wanted to be a daddy to the bubbly little boy. He was certain Mehren’s life would be a hell of a lot better being raised by a wealthy parent where he would want for nothing instead of living in the slums and not knowing where his next meal would come from. All in all, everything has worked out in the end and Mehren is a happy and content child with such a caring and bright personality that Louis often wonders how a child this amazing was a product of rape. 

Aside from his biological standards, Louis’ noticed that Mehren’s taken after Louis in more ways than he could have possibly imagined. Mehren is exceptionally intelligent for his age--Louis claims it’s due to the private daycare Harry insisted on enrolling him in but Harry argues that Mehren’s inherited Louis’ intelligence--that he and Harry are considering bypassing kindergarten altogether and having Mehren start first grade this coming year. 

Louis pulled into the parking lot of their local park and unbuckled Mehren. He kissed his cheek and set him down while he grabbed his phone and locked the car to his brand new Range Rover equipped with all the bells and whistles. Again, Louis insisted that he was content with is beat up Honda Accord but of course Harry wouldn’t have it, claiming Louis deserved to be spoiled with all the finer things in life. So, with that being said his fiance’s status quo, Louis’ been spoiled with name brand _everything_ and it’s been a tad overwhelming.

“Swings!” Mehren chirped, bouncing excitedly next to Louis. “Daddy, swings!”

Louis laughed and took Mehren’s hand, leading him to the small playground. “You can go swing, Mer.” Like any other four year-old, his attention was that of a fly’s and the slides had otherwise caught Mehren’s eyes. He wiggled his little hand out of Louis’ grip and ran to climb the steps.

“Be careful, Mehren,” Louis called after him and and stood by a bench, tracking his son’s every moment. He always had this underlying fear that if he took his eyes off his son for even a second he’d disappear. 

Louis startled when he felt a pair of arms around his middle but relaxed when he felt familiar lips press against his cheek. “Jesus, Haz, you scared me!”

“You’re always jumpy,” Harry countered with a chuckle. Louis rolled his eyes and turned in his arms to peck his fiance’s lips.

“How was work?”

“Always exciting,” Harry answered. “This case is something else, though. It’s definitely going to kick my ass.”

“Between your skill and the attorney’s success rate, you’re going to win, I’m sure.”

“You always say that,” Harry commented.

“Because it’s true. Your firm always wins.”

“Daddy!” Mehren squealed when he saw his other daddy, hopping off the steps and running toward Harry nearly colliding into his legs. 

Harry scooped up the bubbly four year-old and tickled his tummy. “Hey, little man! Did you have a good day today?”

“Uh huh!” Mehren nodded excited, wavy brown hair falling into his face. “Daddy said I was good so I go to park!”

“Is that right? You were a good boy today?”

“Yep!”

“Well then, I think good boys deserve ice cream.”

Mehren’s eyes widened so comically with a gasp that Harry couldn’t help but laugh. “Ows ceam! Ows ceam!”

“Yes, bud, ice cream. Go play a little longer and then we’ll go get ice cream.”

“Otay!” Mehren chirped. Harry kissed his son’s cheek and set him down, watching the little boy run back toward the slides.

“Now he’s not going to eat his dinner, Haz,” Louis whined.

“It’s the middle of the afternoon, Lou. Ice cream won’t spoil his dinner. He eats like his stomach is a bottomless pit.”

 _That’s true,_ Louis thought. Mehren _did_ eat pretty well. “You better hope he does, Styles.”

“Or what, Tomlinson?” Harry challenged.

“No sex for a month,” Louis answered simply, a smirk playing at his lips.

Louis was sure he was victorious in his idle threat until Harry matched his own smirk with a devious one. “Oh, please. You’re more of a sex fiend than I am. You can’t go two days without wanting me.”

Louis’ cheeks pinkened at the fact and swatted Harry’s chest. “Heeey, that’s not fair. You’re always seducing me!” He accused.

Harry scoffed. “Am not! _You’re_ always the one seducing _me._ Quite frankly I’m surprised I haven’t knocked you up yet with the amount of sex we have.”

Louis quirked a brow and bit his bottom lip to prevent the smile that threatened to break through. “Maybe I already am.”

Harry’s face morphed into one of amusement and curiosity, trying to read his fiance’s expression. “Don’t joke about something like that.”

“I’m not,” Louis answered sincerely. “I found out last week. I’m six weeks along.”

The next moment happened so fast, Louis barely had time to register his fiance scooping him up and swinging him around as he kissed him deeply. “Get out! We’re having another baby?!”

“Haz!” Louis squawked in surprise with a laugh, wrapping his arms around Harry’s neck and bringing him down for a tender kiss, excitement radiating between them. “Yes, we’re having another. You get to have a child of your own.”

Louis’ heart swelled when Harry’s eyes pricked with tears. “Oh, Lou, I’ve always considered Mehren as my own. We’re just adding to our family.”

“And you’re really okay with this? I know this baby wasn’t planned a-and that we’re only engaged but--

Harry silenced Louis’ vocal worries with another tender kiss. “No child is ever really planned. Parents do what they can to provide the best for them. But yes, I am extremely thrilled. We get another child to spoil and love and Mehren gets to be a big brother.”

And with those words, all of Louis’ qualms seemed to settle. He smiled and nodded, pulling Harry against him and resting his head against Harry’s chest, listening to his steady heartbeat. “I love you, Harry, so much. You’ve showed me that taking another chance at life was worth it.”

And Harry truly did. Nearly five years ago after that one uneventful night, Louis was prepared to end it all. He was broke, depressed, and pregnant. He was thoroughly convinced every man was horrible and that God had punished him for being gay. But then Harry entered Louis’ life and gave him a new reason to live; gave him hope and happiness.

And now here he is, five years down the road, engaged to the man that changed his world with one child and another on the way. For the first time in his life, Louis was actually content. There was an actual light at the end of the tunnel of what used to be his fucked up life. 

“You deserve all the happiness in the world, Lou,” Harry remarked. “And if I can give you just an _ounce_ of that, then I’m doing my job as your fiance and partner for life.”

“I’m happy, Harry. Truly, I am and it’s all thanks to you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to all who have read and commented on my story! I've got more in the works! Obviously I have to finish Reminiscient and if you're a Supernatural fan, I've got part 2 of Drunk Me coming as well! I also have to add to Psychotic Love but that's a whole different beast! :D


End file.
